You can paint it. Talk to the pros and buy the right primer. You can also update the look with a thickly textured vinyl wallpaper in a neutral tone-on-tone. If you choose wallpaper, be sure to use a liner that is "railroaded" (run side-ways) beneath your paper. This look might cost more, but the lasting updated appearance may be well worth the investment. Be certain to paint all the trim to match.

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it would not be sacrilegious to paint it, but it may be a bigger challenge than you might expect to get a positive result.

I have painted paneling several times. Use a good primer sealer like Kilz or Binz. Fill any tiny gaps. Add nails if needed. Paint with a high grade of cabinet paint vs. a semi-gloss. Use a small sponge roller that is made to use with the cabinet paint. It will look fine.