I used to be a great collector of stuff. Some from family some just other peoples stuff. That time is over for me now I only keep what I really like and enjoy seeing. I even tossed my attempts of doing the family genealogy at one time. I kept the certificates and what a fifth cousin once removed or? sent to me. But the rest got trashed and I was happy to not have to deal with the big binder it was in. For me , and this is just my way of thinking. There is no one in my life I really cared about. Adoptive family were horrible people and I would prefer not to even remember them. I do not really know my birth family that well. It has been almost 20 years since I have seen my Mom. We do speak on the phone once in awhile. I had some of my grandmothers stuff on my fathers side but got rid of it. She did not even want to speak to me when I found her so how can I be sentimental for her stuff. I kept a few things but if I did not have them I would not be upset.

My interest in genealogy started by a group where I used to live but soon became too much work for me and then cousin gave all of it to me in one lump and my interest totally ended after that. this is on my birth family. I have shared this information with a couple people that have asked. I would always do that and do know right where it is in my papers. But as far as digging deeper. Not going to happen. On adoptive parents side I do not even know my adoptive fathers mothers name. Never did. I am wearing her engagement/wedding ring re-done many times over all these years. She left it to me in her will. But I never knew her. I even threw out family photos and I knew who the people were. There is no one left of adoptive family to care. Their story is over.

I have a similar song, not quite as sad as yours, but for many years I was very distant with all my family. Even yet today, I am not in touch with most. But one thing I sort of wish I had done differently was take some of their furniture when they died but I didn't want anything and my uncle and sister sort of guilted me into taking a few small things. In hindsight, I could have disassociated myself from the memories. I just took the easy way out and walked away from it all. I didn't even help them go through all the stuff.

I was over 60 when I got interested in genealogy and that was a detour after I had done my house history and found so many interesting stories about the previous owners. My farm was a bounty to a soldier who fought in the Mexican American War. He died on his way back home and his children eventually sold the warrant to this section of land to a guy with an even better story. And each buyer had a really good story. I even helped people who had those people in their ancestry by showing them the deeds with their ancestor's name on it. The Scotts in particular had a really fascinating story over 2 generations with ups and downs and twists and turns. THAT one was fun! There were a couple of scoundrels. Just a really fun project. And then I had some time left on my ancestry subscription so I put my grandma's name in. It was the only name I knew other than her children. And I was off!

But I've had to buy facts and eventually find "cousins" who shared pictures. I had no memorabilia of my own other than a handful of papers my sister saved before our parent's house was sold. Everything went to the auction. I found that receipt not long ago. I think the whole sale netted us $133. Hindsight.

Well in my case my adoptive mothers stuff was handled by my adoptive brother and aunt. I was friendly with the aunt but it was too much trouble for her to do any shipping and at the time my adoptive mother died I was in the thick of cemetery work with memorial day breathing down our necks. I did not even go to her funeral. Was not really invited to go and it was a thousand mile trip for me bla bla bla. So nothing was passed down to me but the sterling silver partial set she had given me before she died. I still have and use it daily. She would be horrified over that.

Birthmothers stuff is now encased in the hoard house. Need I say more? I know she wanted me to have the cross stitch I did for them for their 40th wedding anniversary. I worked on it pretty constant for 6 months or more. Tiny tiny 22 count single thread stitches and it was a large piece of work. Now who knows what condition it is in. Bugs have probably eaten it.

I have enough crap of my own to want to keep more of some one else. I do have a few mementos of my first husbands and of course lots of Joe's stuff I plan on keeping for my own enjoyment. I really have no desire to try to claim some thing from my family and have no desire to pass my things onto them. I have two pieces of furniture that my birthmom gave to me that would be nice to keep in the family but no one has come forward to get them. My nephew said he would like them. I am not paying to ship them there. I can not afford it now. He can not afford to come get them. Other than that the rest of my stuff is just crap really not worth passing down. It is my crap and I love it but I doubt any one else does.

murraysmom, you can put a tree on ancestry for free and work on it. You won't be able to see what the hints say but you might be able to glean enough information from several of them to add a fact which will generate more hints. And there are a number of free sites, too. Even Google can be a big help. Put your tree at ancestry, use the ancestry hints to look people up at familysearch for free. If you want to do this, email me privately and I can get you started. Also, there are other sites where you can put a tree for free and get hints from other places. After ancestry quit their software all the other major sites rushed in and gave bare bones software for free and a host site for a tree. They all do some kind of hint system now and most are working on partnerships with other depositories just like ancestry does. If you want to, you can do it for free in lots of places. One thing I would not do is put a tree at familysearch because they have some different rules and it's not worth the struggle to have one there.

Thanks, Imhappy, for the information. I will consider it and I appreciate your offer to help. I remember you could do ancestry for free but you had to give them a credit card and remember to cancel before the free time was up.

Yes. Have to cancel! I write those things on the calendar. I have to cancel a subscription in May. Which means I'd better get back there and make sure I've gleaned everything I can from that site. I don't subscribe to any of them year after year. If I pay the money I choose a different research site every time. Once I have everything a particular site has there is no point in giving them more money. In a year or two I might go back. They will probably have new data bases for me to look through.

Sort of along the same line. Today was the auction of my deceased Mom's household contents. I didn't go, but the son and sister-in-law of her second husband did. Afterwards they stopped at the house with a form for me to sign and told me that some things went high others not so much. Expected at an auction. But, one lady bought a box with a collection of small heavy cat figurines called "shelf sitters". They look as tho they are laying on the shelf and their limbs dangle over. In with them was a large ceramic cat. Well, John saw her take the ceramic cat out and then proceed to pitch the other figurines into a trash receptacle!

I guess this is common practice at auctions. I'm just glad I wasn't there, too sad. However I'm betting other people scrounge through those bins after the auctions for such deals don't you? John's wife said there was a truck belonging to a charity shop parked near the auction barn and most likely they collect all the leftover boxes of things that don't sell. Hope they looked in the trash bins.

Oh, I hope so, too. I have been known to take the one item I wanted and turn the rest back in to the sale. I would have taken those shelf sitters!

My sister and I have ALL the stuff. And it's a lot. I am trying to actually use it instead of saving it. When I go, there is nobody to leave it to so it will most likely end up in a thrift shop or landfill anyway.

What I don't understand is why the lady didn't take the unwanted items over to the charity truck if it was right there.

She got what she wanted. End of interest.

I doubt anyone was near the truck but she could have left them on the hood. I wonder if anyone was bidding against her. Or maybe that's the only item anyone wanted. I've bought some things that the only way to get a bid on them was to add something else.

sadly some people don't believe in charity. A friend of mine spotted a perfectly good kid's bike in the trash bin one day and asked her neighbor about donating it. His snarly reply was, I paid good money for it, I don't see why anyone else should get it for free. Lovely. When a second bike showed up the next week she took it and donated it to the refugee center. And started looking for a home in a different neighborhood.