dog vomit fungus.

Thanks. I found it after I posted. I thought it was feces. Then I tried more generic keywords and found it. Its so weird. It hasn't rained in a while.

Looks scary to touch and will probably bury it under some grass clipping and coffee. Unless there is something better to do. I don't like seeing it or accidentally touching it.

Otherwise known as Fuligo septica, or, somewhat less distastefully, scrambled egg slime. It is allegedly edible, no doubt with scrambled eggs rather than dog vomit in mind.

And completely harmless to you or your plants.

I saw it in the morning. Came home after work and couldn't find it without actively looking for it. Lost all color and form

Well, you usually only see scrambled eggs in the morning! I think the amazing thing about slime molds is how fast they grow. The thread-like plasmodium can grow at speeds of an inch-per-hour. That's why it's here today, and wasn't there yesterday. As it grows, it engulfs organic materials, and digests them. But loads of spores are still there when the plasmodium is gone. It'll probably be back.