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I didn’t have any idea how to set this up for help.

I saw an amazing dark/mixed butcher block island when we stayed in Beaver Creek, CO last summer. I was thinking about doing that on my island.

window treatments? I’m not sure - because I can’t spend a lot of money on them.

perimeter countertop - quartz? I love soapstone.

what do I do with the ridiculous amount of wood trim??? I HATE honey oak color (as does almost everyone - so need for it to be changed.

uppers and lowers same color and just use a color “pop” on island?

I literally feel like an alien - I’ve lost 8 years of my life. Time just went by - and I feel like I don’t have a clue. I am still having health issues so traveling to look at showrooms/model homes is t really an option. I will be doing almost everything from my couch (or bed)

thank you.

Here's a refreshing redo that kept the wood but brightened everything else up

https://inbetweenchaos.com/2017/09/29/updating-a-90s-kitchen-without-painting-cabinets/

First of all, congratulations on improved health! I’m glad you’re feeling well enough to be back in your beautiful home.

Secondly, I hope I’m reading between the lines that you are going to pace yourself carefully and not take on everything at once. Even the mental effort of so many decisions will be exhausting and good decisions take time. (I have a chronic illness and disability, so not the same experience as you exactly, but I have experienced feeling better and overdoing out of the joy of being able to do anything at all!)

Thirdly, how do you feel about light warm colors instead of gray? I think a warm cream or greige color might blend better with the oak and give a clean updated calm look to your main living area. If you anticipate getting back to cooking, or someone else cooking while you supervise, then I think practical counters are the way to go...soapstone is great, but for easy cleaning and a nice light look you could even do something like a creamy slab of Corian. They are doing nice thick straight edged pieces of it now; it no longer has that rounded “toddler kitchen” effect from the 80s.

Good luck on getting things fixed up the way you want them, and my best wishes that you’ll be enjoying your house in good health for a long time!

Is the layout good for your current health? I think that painting the cabinets white and replacing the uppers with a few open shelves would go a long way toward brightening up the space. I'd leave the trim around windows wood, I love white and wood together! The walls could be a lighter color too. Maybe an airy grey, or you could do grey cabinets and white walls? Can you attach photos of styles you like?

Congrats on your improved health! I agree with the idea of pacing yourself. So important. One idea in planning your space: reach out to someone who could help you visualize things with mockups. (You could also look into those paint colour visualizers on paint companies websites.) Another trick is to use sheets or poster boards to cover surfaces you're looking to change. Priming walls when you know you'll want a different colour is another idea along those lines.

Have you set your budget? Very important to keep it in mind as you assess your options and timeline. Often, things can be done in stages. Btw, your space didn't give me a laugh in the least. Those windows look amazing.

If this were my space, I'd probably keep the cabinets and wood trim as is (especially if you can change the cabinet doors to their Shaker side) and focus on lightening the space otherwise. Wood is trending again and painting oak cabinets isn't easy. My first priority would be to find effective window treatments for the sun because this can greatly impact one's comfort in the space not to mention energy costs. Window treatments can get pricey. Getting an onsite consultation with a window covering company can help to get ideas of options and cost.

Looking at your space, this is what I'd do:

-Remove all the stuff from above the cabinets.

-Reassess cabinet storage and consider shelves or glass inserts to lighten uppers. I know you'll get advice to change your island because it's not a conventional shape but without being in the space, it's difficult to say if this is easily doable.

-Make sure the lighting in the room is optimized. Could the kitchen benefit from under cabinet lighting, for example? Is the fan useful?

-Replace the backsplash with a warm white tile and match the walls to this new tile. (Paint colour can be matched to anything so paint is chosen last.)

-Consider using this backsplash tile for the fireplace surround.

-Streamline the decor by removing everything off the mantel. Less can be more. A few large pieces on walls can have more decor impact than a bunch of small objects on horizontal surfaces.

Good luck with your space transformation and all the best to you, health wise. Hope you keep us posted.

For the windows, what about doing simple light-filtering roller shades or cell blinds. They could be controlled with long continuous loop cords (or motorized if you have a lot to spend!) Could be combined with decorative drapes on the lowers.

I wanted to add: if your dream is white cabinets, go for it, but as others have expressed, they're not essential to lighten the space. And white cabinets don't obligate white window trim as expressed above. We're seeing a lot of current spaces mixing white and wood trim. You could even consider white uppers and wood lowers. You have plenty of options. If you go for white cabinets, keeping the slate counters would make sense, imo. Changing the backsplash in either scenario would offer a very big bang for your bucks. Pricing out all the options will probably help you decide on your plan.

First of all, thank you to everyone for your replies! I’ve been “lurking“ around this forum for YEARS - and every time I thought I was going to be able to move home, something would happen - and another couple of years would be lost.

I also appreciate the comments about remembering to pace myself. That’s what worries my daughters/family/boyfriend - and, to be completely honest, I worry about it also. My health issues are greatly affected by stress - emotional and physical. In my former life, I was a single mom and a partner at an 800 attorney law firm. I acted like I was “Super Woman” - until I no longer able to. In my mind, I’m still capable of being “Super Woman” - and recently there have been times that I’ve even felt that way physically - but then I’m reminded that I‘m not even a “normal” woman when I become dizzy and pass out (sometimes falling into furniture or down some stairs) - OR - I wind up in the ER. . .

I have so many thoughts about the comments/advice/suggestions I’ve received so far that I wrote some notes down so I could remember who said what. I planned on posting them this afternoon - however, I went into anaphylactic shock - and am currently in the ER - typing this reply on my phone - while trying to convince the medical staff that I‘m ready to be discharged. They seem to think that my 78/42 bp is too low so it appears that I’ll be staying for a bit. I never enjoy being at the ER/hospital obviously - but this is the first time I’ve been here since COVID-19 - so I really don’t want to be here.

I wanted to make sure that you all know how much I appreciate your help. I didn’t want it to seem like I just ignored your replies. Hopefully, I’ll be able to post my thoughts/questions tomorrow. Thanks again!

Sorry to hear about your setback! You have an amazing attitude.

My hope for you is that this is a project that gives you lots of satisfaction, NOT lots of stress (though that will come). Feel better soon.

Sorry to read this news. Please take of yourself. Your health is priority.