Depends on the look you want. Lots of choices of stains but natural is beautiful, too.

I like the look of white oak but not sure if that can be done or if that would ruin the whole look of red oak itself? Are red oaks dated? Thank you for your input any suggestions I really appreciate Thank you again

You cannot get the look of white oak with red oak. You can achieve the look of white ash with it by bleaching.

I would just search pics online of red oak floors and find something you like - perhaps post some pics here and the wood floor experts could suggest colors to achieve the look you want. There are millions and millions of homes with red oak floors, so I don't think they are going away any time soon. They are not the trendy, gray look that people who follow trends are using, but they are timeless and look good with lots of different styles of homes.

I used a mixture of duraseal weathered oak (3 parts) and country white (1 part) with a bona water based sealer. I don’t have a picture on me at the moment, but it kept the floors nice and light and does not pull pink or red at all.

I was told twice now by very good good wood floor experts & both said they recommended highly that I stay natural with the red oak hardwood & use " 3" they specified coats of oil based ( I think on that one) satin sheen finish bc I don't want the high Gloss   Ty to everyone it was all great advice & love the pictures. I can't get over how nice everyone is on this app !! O really appreciate it

* meant to say " good" just once c

Anyone know what stain is a mixture of a brown / gray for the red oak ? I want to keep it natural bc was told but I don't like the red or yellow undertones

Take a look at chemical/reactive stains. It will give you the brown and grey aged look you want.

https://ciranovastore.com/collections/stains-rs/products/reactive-stain