Hi kmarey! Can we get a wider view of the kitchen? Are you doing everything yourself?

~Lyvonne

Go with the charcoal as long as its a warmer toned charcoal...your new stainless appliances will blend in better. Then paint the bulkhead above the cabinets the same Color so it gives the Illusion of taller cabinets because your eye won't stop. I don't think it will clash with the wood but you need to make sure any paint colors around the kitchen are complimentary.

Can you get a picture with the "red woodwork" that you refer to?

Doborah, it's all of the trim in my house is the oak woodwork here. I want to paint the cabinets but it needs to blend with the trim around the window(s), sliding door and floor trim in dinette area. Here's another picture.

We are planning to replace the floor with wood and have it go out from the dinette area down the hall, which will go right next to some oak railing...

I agree that a warm white would be best. Plus if you do dark wood floors it will keep the room light. Charcoal cabinets are beautiful but can't picture it with the oak trim around windows.
But if you really like the idea of the charcoal you could do just the island in it and the rest a warm white. then I would tie in the charcoal in the eating area by painting the chairs and/or base of the table to match.