Catmint, chives, ornamental grasses, for a start.

Your own extension service - through Rutgers University - has one of the best lists for deer resistant plantings.Landscape Plants Rated by Deer Resistance

But it is important to understand that deer resistance does not mean these plants are completely immune to browsing. Deer, especially young deer, will test out or sample any new plant even though they may not feed on it regularly. Winter and lack of other natural browse material can also prompt them to eat plants they would otherwise avoid. And deer also don't read the books so your experience may be different :-)

I get that deer might browse anything, but some things are safer than others. For example, sedum are supposed to be deer-resistant, but I've had them chomped on. Grasses and strong-smelling plants are safer. I'm not supposed to say 100%, but catmint and things in the onion family, as well as ornamental grasses are usually a pretty good

bet. The thing about grasses is that most that I know of are very drought tolerant and come in colors from purples to silvery to variegated, so there's lots of 'color' there. And there's nothing like those plumes in the autumn! PS - I am also in north Jersey.

I have deer, also in NJ. Herbs are fine as stated above (lavender, catnip, sage, thyme, etc). No problem with deer and Russian sage. Hellebores, and columbines are ignored. IRIS is a most have. You mentioned, southwestern, there is always Opuntia humifusa...,. but you have to deal with the prickly factor and they are hard to weed around .

Hellebores, but they are EXPENSIVE. These are currently in bloom and they started a couple of weeks ago, so long lasting..., and several of these flower in December.

Siberian Iris, all Iris are deer proof. Mid May is likely the peak

These Opuntia are in a pot, they will spread in the ground. Leaves will shrivel up in the winter, NOT DEAD, and magically look like this again around April, flowers in June. DEEF PROOF!

In Michigan here, but lots of experience with very hungry deer. I have found geranium Rozanne to be utterly deer proof, and it provides color all summer long. Also echinacea…I have Wildberry and white PowWow and deer leave them alone. Achillea, salvia, catmint, calamint, are all deer proof for me. Coreopsis Zagreb, Shasta daisy, heliopsis Tuscan Sun - all sun loving and deer proof (for me). And clematis as well, my deer never touch them.

Edited to add photo of Rozanne geranium (purple flowers lining walkway). She’s unruly, but I love her so much!

Also for shrubs, potentilla are deer resistant and constantly blooming with cheery yellow flowers. I’ve also come to love Double Play Doozie spirea as well; blooms all season with dark pink blooms. Both of these shrubs are drought tolerant and the deer leave them alone.