Photos?

If you paint the stained trim it will need primer two coats of paint and caulking to cover sufficiently. A lengthy process; live with it for a year and then decide what you want to do or hire it all done by a pro who can finish fast.

These are the other photos

I think it looks nice, you may want to look at warm greys..greige for you paint choices.

Thank you Rekha. Any ideas about furniture? It looks like the previous owners used a lot of the same color wood to furnish the home but I really don't like that.

I love the oak trim and would not paint it, but I would definitely paint the walls.

My house is like this...A sea of oak.

When we moved in, I noticed that the rooms with cabinetry (study, family room, kitchen also had oak molding. The room without cabinetry had painted molding.

I don't know if it's "right" or not, but it looks just fine that way. At least to me, but I am not a pro. We were also able to have more variety as far as wall paint colors in the rooms with white trim.

hth.

I would go with darker wood and neutral upholstered furniture and add colors through accessories or smaller pieces of furniture. I have a very orangy floor, and dark wood seems to go well, as well as lighter upholstered pieces.

I noticed that as well! I keep telling my boyfriend that the trim is dated and everything else isn't. It just seems off. How hard is it to paint finished trim? Also, about the seating areas in the bay windows, can they be painted as well?

I would definitely paint the trims (baseboards and windows, maybe the ramp too) in white as the ceilings but keep the wood doors and the wood stairs. So you keep a warmer feeling.

I'm not sure that your trim is dated - the thing is to bring the contemporary vibe to the casework and trim. It is a more interesting house for the higher end wood trim than if you just had painted trim - painting the trim alone won't do it - it will take sanding, two coats of primer and then a coat of paint to paint all your trim and doors. Whereas we can shift just a few pieces of casework more easily . . and potentially use chalk paint and wax (no priming, no sanding). One other priority - take a photo of the 3!!! THREE crystal chandeliers and put them on ebay for mucho bucks - use that money to buy rustic modern chandeliers with wood and black iron elements - coordinating but not matching - both pottery barn and restoration hardware have these - drop them to 9' - then, consider two things: a great rug for your living room sitting area and a sofa that heads towards classic modern.

I had the same issue when we moved into my house. It seems like a lot of orangy tones in your house, too much of the same. I suggest leaving the wood for the office or den and painting the rest white throughout the house.

I'm going to make a wild guess that your boyfriend is a man and, as such, you must realize he is constitutionally incapable of painting wood. It's in their DNA. Normally I recommend you send him on a fishing trip and do it in his absence, but in this case, I believe he'll have to be gone for a month, and you probably can't eat that much fish.

Try showing him these renderings instead. (And please replace that front door. It just does not fit this house.)

I love stained wood, but agree that this looks a bit dated. Have you considered using stain to darken it? It would be much easier than painting and would give the wood a warmer look. You would have to seal it with something like polyurethane.

This is probably pretty close to BM Steam with an adjustment for lighting. I put back your original door.

I stained the trim earlier, but didn't post it because I liked the white better. Here it is stained dark:

A good compromise is to paint the trim only. I have this combination - white trim with oak cabinets and doors. It gives me the flexibility to go with white when I want or wood - so, I painted a dark bookcase white and one bath vanity is white, but the rest are wood. Laundry cabinets are white, but kitchen is wood.

That said, I don't think the trim work is that bad. My mom's is similar and I really find her house warm and inviting.

White trim with oak:

I would definitely be more open to just painting to trim white. I feel that this would be a good compromise.

Gold paint with golden oak.......................too much. Before I decided to paint the trim white, I would repaint all the walls. The paint colors for all the rooms in the house are just not really well thought out. Painting the trim white is not going to help that. I would paint the complete home a neutral paint color and add any color required with art, furnishings and an occasional accent wall.

I really feel like stained wood trim is either your style or it's just not. If you're not drawn to it I would bite the bullet and paint it. My husband and I happen to adore white trim and wouldn't be able to leave stained trim alone and it would bother us until we changed it. I think most paint colors look really bad with stained trim (especially orange or red toned stains) so it really limits what you can do unless you're drawn to earthy colors. If you do paint, be patient and take your time because it will be a nightmarishly long drawn out process that will take forever...but so worth the end result.

Because your architecture is contemporary yet eclectic, your house needs some interest that echoes quality elements. The wood trim kind of does that for you here. For that reason and the work it would take to change it is why I suggested you paint the walls and then consider your options. In many architectural styles white painted trim is a big plus but here it actually eliminates something that helps you advance an eclectic contemporary look. I might be tempted to stain it a little brown.. maybe take it in a walnut direction rather than the Deep expresso that Grover shows us. I think that before you paint it out you need to think about the result of the finished room. Sadly, here the result would be kind of Cottage like and that isn't as helpful with your architecture to advance the style that would bring this eclectic look together. While I'm generally a fan of painting wood out, in this case I think it can really help you in advancing a rustic contemporary result. In fact you may want to add some faux wood beams someday in the future... Consider using the wood finishes to advance that look.

Oh, groveraxel, laughing out loud here in bed, while husband snoring away: "guessing your boyfriend is a man...men are constitutionally incapable of painting wood...send him fishing....might take a month...can't eat that much fish..." Omg. So funny. So true.

Leave the kitchen as it is, but paint out all the rest of the wood as it chops up the walls. Paint the face of the counter and the strange lump at its end the same colour as the seating area. Anchor the seating on a generous rug and put some art (HUNG AT SEATED EYE LEVEL) on the walls. You could even include a mirror.

Definitely ditch the oak in the bathroom and bedrooms. The main space feels very undomestic. Try to make it more friendly.

Here we go - the promised images. Black or charcoal paint on the beadboard front of your island / kitchen would do a lot for you if you don't want to paint any of the wood cabinets yet.

Of course, when you are a new home buyer, there are lots of things you want to do. Finding the rustic modern look that suits you two will take time. What you can do is build on some of the strengths that are built in. You have beautiful casework / cabinetry in your kitchen. A hardwood floor! Neat architectural stair and railing.

Real wood windows, doors and trim are so expensive that they are not typically found in a new home, or even a custom built home except at the high end. They wear like iron (don't require maintenance since chips don't show, etc.). However, to make them feel updated and modern, you need to have a color strategy.

The images above are just to give you a sense of how white walls could make the space feel with the appointments that you have. It is also the easiest first step / least expensive DIY. If you paint and change out your lighting, ideas to come below, the house will feel like yours - you can turn your focus to area rug, sofa, end tables, lamps, art . .things to make it personal and functional.

Here, because of the black iron on your loft and stair, (and the fact that most media is black), a black and white palette (with all shades of gray in between) can be terrific with natural wood. If you start there, focus for a while and only add things in one chosen accent color - color is safer to do mostly in art and pillows. I might suggest a strong sunflower yellow, but reds can work with this palette. Cobalt blue or apple green could also work. Look back at the photos - there are shots of cobalt in the kitchen, red element accents in both of the bedrooms, and the neutral palette advances the clean, updated feeling.

You might try different primary accents in different spaces - great room with sunflower tones, lemons in a bowl on the table .. I could see the master bedroom with graphite on the bath cabinet and window seat, a gray painted rustic headboard or headboard accent wall, with white, gray and apple green linens, towels and accents.

This can be pretty, not just stark (just be sure not to get blue grays - blue grays and blue greens will make your wood tones look more orange than they really are)

Here are the kind of light fixtures (etsy has great deals from makers direct) that marry the contemporary scale of your place with the rustic details. The two major crystal chandys and the one in the breakfast room area should sell well to finance new lighting but don't advance the modern rustic vibe you will love. On the two main elements, do measure to the ceiling height and only buy what can hang low enough to hit at least 10' overhead - 9' would be best. A very simple black iron fan with no light kit would be best - and I can't tell from photos but they almost look too close now - you might go as large as the size guides recommend for the size of your room - you won't have a conflict if you drop it lowest - at 9' the fan will cool well (downstairs) . . the only issue is at night with fan on and lights on the fan will make it feel like the light is flickering! If there is plenty of distance, and the fan is secondary, hang the fan higher than the chandy.

http://www.lightingdirect.com/kichler-43193-grand-bank-6-light-25-wide-chandelier-with-seedy-glass-shades/p2304660 (not high enough and a bit pricey but the image is there)

https://www.etsy.com/listing/263281745/ready-to-ship-industrial-six-6-light?ref=market

for the breakfast dining space - something perhaps like this? http://www.lightingdirect.com/kichler-43058-braelyn-5-light-25-wide-chandelier-with-seedy-glass-shades/p2232695

for nearer the side door / formal dining table area? https://www.etsy.com/listing/233901227/17-pendant-light-wood-fixture-reclaimed?ref=market

pendants over the island . . https://www.etsy.com/listing/229664028/matte-flat-black-cone-spun-industrial?ref=shop_home_feat_4

These are ideas to get you thinking - don't mix black and bronze like I did . . pick one and stick with it . .. .