Rosefolly - so, so sorry that this catastrophe happened! Your attitude that, as no one was hurt, or other people's property damaged, it could have been worse is very commendable.

If I were you, I would just wait to see what everything looks like after the mess is cleared up. The damaged roses will recuperate most likely, and perhaps also some of the "killed" ones, as long as they were not totally uprooted. However, losing a massive tree is of course impossible to do anything about in the short run, and I would grieve for it too.

I am sure that you will soon re-group and come up with some sort of great plan for your garden, as you have recently. I don't know what the fastest growing tree (or tall shrub) is which would like your conditions, but hopefully you will get some suggestions from others on here.

jackie

I'm so sorry -- that is a very sad loss. There is certainly no replacing a big tree like that in a single lifetime, but I guess it is an act of faith and goodwill for the future to try. There is beauty in that gesture, even if the immediate beauty of the mature tree is no longer there.

Rosefolly, I read your story and felt very sad for you. Then I saw your stunning view and was a bit jealous! I'm contemplating some tree plantings too and know that I will never see them in real life as I see them in my mind's eye. As I age, I am thankful for each day and embrace change as the spice in a life that could be very bland. I sincerely hope you enjoy the journey to a new look for your landscape.

I'm sorry! It's so fortunate that nobody was hurt. At least now you don't have to worry about the day the tree might fall, as you must have in the past. It's happened now, it's over, and your family is safe. That tree has given so much, supported so many generations of life over many decades, the loss of the tree now doesn't take away the beauty that it contributed to the world all this time. I might save a peice to remember it by.

All ends with beginnings.

Oh, Rosefolly. I am so sorry! It’s those huge blows after the shock and recovery from an initial one that really deflate one. I know it must feel totally overwhelming right now, so many cascades of trials on top of each other, so take some very deep breaths and give yourself time to recover and regroup. Mother Nature and your insurance company are making a lot of decisions for you, but I am greatly relieved that the changes that were beyond your control didn’t involve injuries or lawsuits!

I am guessing that in time, you will adjust to the very uninvited situation. The forum will be here to support you and celebrate each step of your new plans for your landscape! Like Jennifer, I see a magificent view beyond your much loved and historical downed tree. Perhaps you can build on this new vision? The world keeps changing beneath our feet, houses and gardens, and the universe has agendas we can only guess at. I hope you and your DH can find your centers of gravity again, take some time to adjust to the unexpected space in which you’ve found yourselves and create something both beautiful and maybe even more manageable and less worrisome than what came before!

With forum love and mountains of empathy,

Carol

Rosefolly I'm so sorry to hear that! I hope that as you get the tree removed and the debris cleared up, that the damage to the plants below will prove to be not as severe as first thought. So glad that no one was injured with the tree fall!!

Talk about "heart-stopping." My God. I sure hope that never happens to our neighbor's tree.

The unplanned loss of a major feature in the garden landscape is always a shock, but this was sort of at the extreme end of such events, so it seems in this case very natural to at first be discouraged, Rosefolly. With a bit of time, as you observe the new landscape before you and with a gardener's eye, I bet new ideas about what to do with the new space, consistent with our new environmental constraints, will soon arise. Gardening, at its heart, is an evolutionary process. But, that was, indeed, a magnificent old pine.

Rosefolly, I almost didn't answer this. I'm not a regular on this forum (used to be a few years back) and I came here to ask a question and saw your post.

I've been in my house for a little over 25 years. One of the reasons we fell in love with the property was a beautiful triple-trunk oak tree. I put in a lovely shade bed around it, and it was my favorite feature on my acre property. It doesn't matter that there are about 40 other oaks. This was THE oak, and I loved it.

About six years ago I noticed that there was a large crack in the base (the base is about 6-7 feet high). We called a wonderful tree person, and she cabled it for us and thought we'd get at least another ten years with it. But there have been so many hurricanes and tropical storms lately, normally unusual for Connecticut but seeming to become the norm now. And so after another two really big storms, I saw the crack had widened and one of the cable had disconnected.

We had to take down the tree. That was three summers ago and I am still heartbroken. I had them leave the six-foot high stump because I couldn't bear to lose the whole thing completely. My shade garden is now in sun, and my hostas burn each year. We didn't have the damage you had, because it didn't fall but was removed, so that is something you are dealing with that I didn't have to, but I certainly share your pain in this kind of loss. And so many people think I'm strange because I mourn the loss of this tree, when it happened and still three years later!

I am finally starting to think about replacing it. I initially was going to immediately replant another oak, and was looking into a decent size replacement when my husband lost his job. Well, no money to spend on a tree. But in the meantime I realized, like you, that I would never live to see another oak reach this size (we were told the oak was probably about 200 years old).

So now I am thinking about a smaller, ornamental, flowering tree. It will never take the place of my oak, but hopefully it will give me back some of the shade I love, and will make my garden a peaceful and restful place once again, and give me some joy in and of itself.

So, I guess this was kind of long, but I wanted you to know that I know how you feel, and that it might take some time but hopefully you can look at this as an opportunity to replant something that will give you some joy. Maybe not the same thing and the same joy, but another thing and another kind of joy. And in the meantime you do have that spectacular view to enjoy. I only had my neighbor's house lol.

I hope you can soon find it in yourself to look at this space and think about the future and find something to put there that will give you joy again!

:)
Dee

Dee, thank you for writing that heartfelt note. All the posts people have written were gratefully received and read, and I'm pondering over them all. Yours had the added impact of having come from someone who went through the same thing, always a plus.

I'm not where you are now, but perhaps in time I will be. I've planted many trees as my gift to the future, but somehow particular this space needs something more than that, something with more immediate impact.

At the moment, I have very little interest in gardening. I never understood how people could just walk away from gardening but right now that is actually how I feel. I can't do anything before the fall rains anyway. Perhaps I'll get my cheer back by then.

Rosefolly, I am so sorry to hear of the loss of such a lovely and large tree specimen.

I'm glad no person was hurt.

It is a lovely gesture to plant for the future. I've been doing that this year.

Someday, someone years after I'm gone will see those trees and admire them.

Take care and keep up that sunny outlook!

Steven

Everybody has made such wise and kind comments that I have nothing to add except my sympathy for the loss of your tree. When you're forced to take comfort in no one's having died, you know it's tough. I can understand your being discouraged now, but believe that, sooner or later, you'll recover and get busy again, garden as though you were going to live another eighty years. It had never occurred to me that there was a positive side to our having no mature trees in our big garden. Now I can appreciate that we won't have to watch the end of life of a mature, much-loved tree, or deal with the resulting mess. Something to be thankful for as our seedlings get past knee height. Life is change.

Our big beautiful pine fell. I heard it's roots break like a group of kids popping bubble wrap. It fell into the street and thankfully no one was there. I left that spot open for a time, but later planted a pomegranate after being tired of the visual hole there. The pomegranate has pretty flowers and fruit and provides shade for the plants below. It's not what that beautiful pine was. Edison removed the 50 year old golden ash tree. I do miss those old friends. I agree that it takes time to get used to the new situation. Nobody likes having something like that forced on them. There is comfort in watching our gardens grow and being familiar with them. It's natural to feel down about the loss of your nice tree.

Most gardeners have a special connection with the natural world, the land, the trees. It's a real loss when you lose a mature tree. I was in my 40s when our neighbor cut down a mature Sugar Maple in their yard that was directly in my line of vision when I was at the kitchen sink. One day after dinner I started washing dishes and looked up and the tree was gone. They had removed it when I was out, in order to put in a pool. I just cried. It took me quite awhile to get over that. Now that I am well past my 40s, losing a mature tree is something difficult to replace.

Our neighborhood is aging and it's at that point where more and more neighbors are removing or losing trees. And while it is impossible to replace mature trees in the time frame where you will be able to enjoy them as mature trees, I guess there is always the option of moving to gain the mature trees you are losing, or to be outside of wildfire threats. Change is inevitable but even when we are older, we are not locked into change without a say so. We still have options. Focusing on keeping yourself as healthy as possible extends the time you continue to have options, despite your age.

Somewhere, downslope, someone's garden is going to appreciate all the water that your tree isn't going to use any longer. And, as gardeners do, they aren't going to have a clue as to why, all of a sudden, some plants are growing better than they ever have before.

When we bought this farm, it came with acres of forest. The trees closer to the house I though would outlive me. Boy, did I learn a lesson. The maple I planted iris around the base of fell onto the road a year later. The magnificent oak just beyond the barn, the one that I mused saw the Civil war encampment here, got a disease several years later and is gone, as is the one behind it . Neither made particularly good fire wood, but we burned it anyway.

The huge maple that caused us to add a circular walkway to the addition instead of a walkway with a ninty degree angle, we didn't want to hurt its roots. It feel forward onto the root when a minor tornado came through a couple of years later. That was when I decided that trees are heart breakers and can't be depended on.

Your experience and your appreciation of that massive tree are so understood and commiserated with. What is did is a reswipe at all your plans, and that hurts, too.

Remember reading about Capability Brown, who designed landscapes for the present and future? Mr. Brown didn't have to deal with North American heart breaker trees that grow faster (warmer) and then tear our best laid plans up.

Maybe spring and fall blooming bulbs and whatever natives respond to rains, when you get them.

So sorry, though, for what was, and for the care that you took to do things the right way. gardening is not for the faint of heart.

Ann, gardening indeed is not for the faint of heart. I have the mental picture of ladies strolling through the flower gardens. Well maybe someday when I am ninety I shall put on a pretty dress and stroll, but as for now, I am all jeans and a T-shirt and broken fingernails and struggles with shovel and varmints and frustration when my plans don't work as I had envisioned them. That is okay. It gives me something to look forward to when I am ninety.

You can probably tell I am in a little better place just now. Yesterday I was exhausted with the shock and short of sleep from weekend visitors, very welcome but strenuous. Last night I slept long and deeply and it was restorative. Now I am making plant lists. Not just for the trees I am going to put in, but for repair to a damaged native flowers bed and something to dilute the bareness of the huge dirt area left by the tree's absence. I think I'll extend the groundcover of Salvia 'Bee's Bliss' further. Four of the fruit trees were reduced to splinters, but one has amain trunk with some leaves left, pluot 'Dapple Dandy'. I was all for removing it and starting over, but Tom would like to try to save it. He gets a vote, so we will try. Our tree men cut off the remaining splintered branch and I will give it a good drink of water. I was out there with my itty bitty root pruning saw and I'm pretty sure they were laughing at me, but their faces wiped clean into courteous respect when I turned to look. "Show off" I said, when one walked up with his chain saw, but he did what the tree required, and we were both happy. In the fall I'll plant coast live oak and a valley oak, two natives that grow reasonably fast, for oaks at least. The valley oak may not be the best choice if the drought goes on for decades as some think it will, but I love them dearly so I will try. I have a couple others outside the fence. Maybe they will all make it. Next spring I will replace my favorite apricot 'Goldensweet' and also plant a plum, not sure just which one yet.

Beyond the fruit trees, other than replacing or repairing the roses on the fence once we have the fence back (I'm guessing another month), I'm going with mostly natives, though I may stick in the odd non-Mediterranean native where one makes sense. I like natives okay, not as much as roses, lilacs, peonies and the like, but they work better in a large garden in times of water shortage. Fortunately the front garden of traditional garden plants was not touched.

Thanks to all who took a virtual walk with me along this path.

Rosefolly

Rosefolly. I am so sorry for the loss of your stately old tree.

You are such a trooper with a gardner's heart, after a good cry, you start planning what comes next

I love that that is how gardners roll with the punches, always taking heartbreak and using that blow to add something new and moving on.

Blessings on your new plantings

Rosefolly -- I'll echo the other wonderfully kind and empathetic comments here -- so sorry for the loss of the tree, the loss of history, and the recognition of our own mortality when we think about the number of years we will have to watch a tree grow...So many layers and layers here.

We lost a big oak Thanksgiving before last -- totally ruined my native shade plantings, but did open up the sunlight for three new fruit trees, a raised bed, and more roses!

When we had an inspector come to our house, he said "we love to see roses!" I think he was referring to them being well watered. But none of mine climb on the house. Up against the house we have very low shrubs.

I hear what you mean, though, about repeated blows to the garden (and our psyches) -- I'd got used to so many things -- gophers, ground squirrels, rabbits, crazy hair dryer winds that gust up to 70-80 mph, drought, etc. But then the deer came through and took out the big spring bloom that I'd waited for all year and then my ceanothus hedgerow, and then the tops of my tomatoes and most of my fruit trees. I've been very discouraged. Sigh. So, I feel your pain.

I've been doing a lot of reading, and came across the difference between hope and optimism. While I'm skeptical that we can just arbitrarily make these kinds of distinctions, I appreciate the underlying concepts (if not the attachment of particular words to them - much like preachers who say there's a difference between joy and happiness, and then deride happiness -- I want to say -- who made you in charge of language?) -- anyway -- the difference between hope and optimism is that optimism is an act of a consumer who demands, and hope rests with a ferocious commitment to labor. "If one is a child and in need of help, then the differences between optimism and tenacious hope take on pragmatic significance, as one parent, guardian, friend or teacher assumes all will work out and another simply never quits trying to assist. Tenacious hope does not assume that one will meet success in existence, but without the labor of genuine hope and care, existence resembles a garden without a caretaker" (Ron Arnett, 2012). Sometimes I feel like a consumer when ordering roses (or other plants), but then I think of myself overall more like a caretaker with tenacious hope.

So here's wishing you an extra dose of tenacious hope. And serenity. And strength!

So sorry you have to go through this, Rosefolly. I love old trees too.

Sheila, I am Rosefolly here, but on some other sites I am called TreeLover'sDaughter.

My goodness, there are some wise people here who have written words on the subject that I never could. People here have lost trees that have been huge parts of their lives. Rosefolly, I'm sorry for the loss that has entered your life. I hope you can rejoice in your connection with trees, with plants...with nature. If you didn't have that deep connection, you wouldn't have felt the loss as deeply as you did. Once you've had a pet die (as you've probably had...since you have dogs...I'm glad they're safe), you suffer such shock. But most of us go on and get another dog...because our lives are better with dogs...even with the coming loss of their passing. Maybe in a while, you can get another tree...because your life is better with that connection. I don't know if I've said this well...but my heart goes out to you.

I come late to the discussion,but I do so want to add my condolences to you, Rosefolly, for the loss of your tree, and my admiration and hearty approval of your attitude. Many of the comments of other members have expressed so well what it means to lose a tree.

However, that view IS just beautiful. I don't know how your property lies, exactly, but if it is the way I envision it, what I'd do is construct a sort of "frame" for that vista. I'd build or have built two very tall pillars -they'd have to be very sturdy, but one could do it pretty cheaply by making two VERY tall obelisks out of thick rebar. Then, I'd plant vines to grow up them; I myself envision something evergreen like jasmine or ivy; something that grows fast. I'd place them next to each other, like a sort of portal, perhaps one on each side of where your tree used to be,thus framing the view and commemorating said tree. A very tall arch would be nice, too, but that would be harder to do, and more expensive,since I think to make the statement you'd need a much taller, sturdier arch then the ones sold prefabricated.Best wishes, Eileen

Thanks for the suggestion, Eileen. It woud indeed have to be enormous! I suspect that the space is bigger than it looks in the photo. I'm having trouble encompassing scale.

My husband wants trees, so trees it will be. For environmental reasons we want native oaks. We are thinking of a Quercus lobata (valley oak) on the rise where the pine was, a Quercus agrifolia (coast live oak) lower on the hill outside the fence, and a Quercus douglasii (blue oak) off to the lower slope in the other direction where the apricot trees used to be. We have another spot where an apricot tree can go, and really we only need one. Our four pluots and plums will go down to one of each. I was perhaps a tad enthusiastic when I was selecting fruit trees. We never come near eating it all. The valley oak and the coast live oak grow fast (for oak trees), but none of them will block the view in our lifetimes, and probably not in our children's.

Meanwhile, a report on the roses. It looks like 'Rambling Rector', a long time favorite of mine, will be fine. I had to remove a good bit of it but enough remains for such a vigorous rose to come back. Climbing Devoniensis is gone. I'm not going to replace it. Beautiful though it was - and it was gorgeous - it was the most miserable rose to prune and train. I've never seen a rose with more vicious, painful thorns. It was also covered with a permanent low-level fungal disease I never identified. This was mostly on the canes not the leaves. Something made me think of downy mildew, but the rose was so vigorous whatever it was didn't faze it. In fact, I'm not going to plant anything there at all, and instead put a new gate in the fence. We will need access to be able to plant the new trees. I also lost General Schablikine which had recently been moved as part of the please-the-insurance-company project. I may replace it in time. I'm just grateful that the landscapers accidentally switched Anna Olivier and the General. Because of the error Anna is now safe, and even starting to make growth buds. The General is far more easily replaced. I do not think any commercial nurseries are carrying the true Anna Olivier these days. Climbing Maman Cochet also took a hard hit, but there is a reasonable amount of it left. If the extensive fencing repair-and-replace work yet to come does not harm it any further, I think it will recover. Time will tell. Like General S, Cl MC can be replaced. and I probably will if need be.

I did get the true Anna Olivier from Greenmantle, Rosefolly, a few years ago. I always wanted a Cl Devoniensis, but I have a bush one from Greenmantle too.

Good luck with all this. I have an Italian Stone Pine I planted in 2015. I hope it stays up. I guess if yours stayed up 80 years I have a way to go with it.

We had to remove a 150 ft pine tree and it's heartbreaking so Im sorry for ur loss. We were advised by the arborist to plant a western red cedar as they r extremely fast growing and well rooted. We also planted 3 roses near the tree in a triangle fashion which is grow fast. Any help at all? We used old garden roses since they grow so

Starchild, thank you for generously sharing that information. Much appreciated!

However we are staying away from planting any conifers at all. With the exception of redwoods they are all highly combustable, and we are trying to landscape for fire resilience. Redwoods are moderate on the flammabiity scale, right there with oaks and many other hardwoods. In any case, we already have four redwoods, limbed up high to make them safer.