We were in similar situation. We went ahead with our plans. Because of how the addition needed to be done, we had to get a varian. The next door neighbor came to the meeting and objected but we were granted permission from the city anyway. We just made sure to keep out construction site clean next to our neighbors and not to give them a reason to complain about anything. Some of the members of that family moved on and wanted to have a good relationship with us, some of them they stopped talking to us. It is, what it is. I just wanted to mention that the house we remodeled was in really bad condition and definitely after renovation improved the look of neighborhood.

Thank you! This is very helpful. Just to know that it happens, people move on (or don't) and everything works out in the end. Also, making sure the construction site is clean is definitely key.

The house we bought is in nice condition, built in the 50s but kept up well. The previous owner did some decent improvements to the exterior the year or two she owned it, but the roof is in dire need of replacement. So, sadly the benefits will be less in terms of curb appeal, and more structural. We really do want it to blend in as much as possible though, so hopefully that helps the neighbors a little.

We had a neighbor not very happy with us when we put an addition on our house a few years ago. We made sure to warn our GC who, in turn, made sure the subs only parked on the street in front of their home if there was no alternative, never accidentally blocked their driveway, or left trash between our 2 houses, etc. You can't make everybody happy, but you can try to minimize their inconvenience.

I have to add, unless you know the neighbor really well, a bottle of wine may not be an appreciated gift. They may not drink or are perhaps a recovering alcoholic; if they're already unhappy with you, the gesture will backfire.

You are so nice, that you made me wish I was you neighbors :-). You neighbor seem insecure and she probably doesn't know how to express it. I think your strategy is great. Let us know how everything goes

I can see your neighbors concern when someone adds a 2 story house next to single story houses. There is a good chance that you will have sight lines into their backyard and even into their home, so you might want to consider window placement when you design your addition.

I wish everyone had neighbors as thoughtful as you. Putting myself in your contentious neighbor's shoes, one thing that would concern me about a 2nd story on a house in close proximity would be my loss of privacy in my yard. Having a huge house looming over my property that I've been able to use without anyone being able to see in, would be very worrisome to me.

If there is any way to get more info from her to find out specific concerns she might have, there might be a way you could address that with her. If it's lack of privacy, maybe think about that when placing windows in your 2nd story and if you can adjust things without compromising your own plans, maybe you can give her some reassurance that you will do your best.

If she's just resistant to change for change's sake, then there's not much you can do to mollify her. But I think sometimes if people just feel they are being heard, it can go a long way to smoothing things over.

Never does the green monster rear its ugly head higher and louder than when some "outsider" dares build a bigger nicer house than the old-timers.

And today the "community" can always disguise its jealousy as their sincere and heartfelt opposition to "gentrification", "white supremacy" and "colonialism."

Prior to our most recent appearance at the Committee of Adjustment for zoning variances, our dear neighbours of eight years presented a petition opposing our "monster" house, including (gasp!) a legal basement suite. This could be a B&B horror, they warned. Yep, that's how most multi-million dollar homes end up. Using her cane, our daughter slowly came to the mike to explain that she and her husband would be the residents there.

While we got the re-zoning approved, over 3 years later, no building permit. More than one way to block those uppity outsiders! (Leave aside, various worthies being followed by the police for blocks and others asked what they're doing in this neighbourhood.) Fortunately, none of them are joggers.

I do take silent pleasure when a next-door neighbour petition signer keeps asking when we're starting. The deteriorating stripped and vacant hulk that we used to live in surrounded by tree protection fencing is evidently not nice to contemplate. Live with it!

"So, don’t worry about your neighbors."

@jkent9024 excellent point about the wine!! I've been thinking about that too. I'm hoping to get to know the neighbors a little better to make sure I don't make that mistake! I really appreciate that feedback! I'll have to think of a nice gesture that would suit anyone. Baked goods are hard these days, because of allergies. That's the only other thing I can think of! I have awhile to think about it, so hopefully something good comes to mind.

@bpath Ugh. I'm so sorry to hear that. That's definitely what we're trying to avoid! We have our own needs, but we don't want to infringe on our neighbors needs. It's definitely a balance!

All of this feedback about the privacy and concerns about two stories is so so helpful.

What I'm learning from all of this even more so before posting, is that in a way we need to remodel for us but also as considerate to our neighbors as well. Not just curb appeal, but layout/window placement etc.

I appreciate everyone's insight so much!

@Olychick Our neighbor actually mentioned privacy! So we're definitely going to keep that in mind. It definitely seems like a lot of things she won't like, just because they are a change, but privacy is huge no matter what (it would be a big deal for me as well). Plus, I don't necessarily want to be peaking into her house/backyard anyways haha so hopefully there are good solutions for what we're hoping to do that won't make her or any future neighbor uncomfortable.

I appreciate that feedback!

Interesting that the problems and resentments expressed here are from people asking for or living next to zoning variances - requests to change the rules that everyone else thought they were playing under.

Yes, the pleasures of zoning!

In our most recent run-in, the existing house, built as part of a sub-division in 1964, didn't meet the decades later zoning.

As a result, all new homes proposed in the area have to run the gauntlet. Which under the guise of zoning, grading, engineering, tree protection and building review, can include personal, political, racial and ethnic animus. Makes one yearn for the Rotten Apple, where a few bucks or the right connections got you a permit!

On the bright side, no HOAs here!

Worthy, do all those committees/reviews require fees to submit applications? I'm going to guess the answer is yes!

Regarding the zoning, my neighbors were not happy with our plans even before any varians were mentioned. They had a chance to voice their concerns at the meeting and their only argument was that they had been living in this neighborhood for 20 years and they like it as is and they don't want any changes. Our varian was about such a little thing that it wouldn't effect them any negative way.

The better the addition design, the better the relationship with your neighbor after construction is completed. The house warming party afterward will help too.

Mark, yes! Another house in our old neighborhood had a well-designed addition and it made it bearable. Another help is if the addition doesn’t affect the neighbors’ drainage in their yards. Not so sure about the party, but definitely a tour.

Other issues we had with the next-door remodel: the crew left their lunch trash strewn about in the back yard. They blocked our driveway. A tall truck broke a branch on our tree as the back end of the truck swung over our yard. They cracked our driveway apron. They eventually fixed it, but didn’t tell us they were doing so, blocking us from exiting our driveway while the concrete dried. At school pick-up time. The flooring guys were trying to make a construction deadline, so I had to go over 3 times to tell them to stop so my toddler whose room was 12’ away could go to sleep. The 3rd time i told him he had 10 minutes before I called the police, because they were supposed to have stopped work at 6 and it was now 7:30.

I couldn’t call the homeowner about anything because they either blew it off as ”well, it’s construction” or, later, ”I’m dealing with so much right now, I can’t handle your complaint.”

I couldn’t call the contractor, either, because he complained about the homeowner. When he fixed the driveway apron (and blocked me in), he said ”I THOUGHT you’d be HAPPY it’s fixed.” Aargh.

So, design it well, keep it clean, keep the work hours within reason or within municipal rules, be responsive, don’t ask your neighbors what they think of the color you chose because they just might tell you.

My advice: Don’t discuss possible plans with neighbors until you have them. It stokes their fears and dread. Get advice from experienced contractors and architects about what’s possible to build and approved by your city. Then stick to that. There’s a lot of complaining from neighbors but they can’t stop the project if it conforms to the zoning regs.

do all those committees/reviews require fees to submit applications?

If you have to ask, you can't afford it!

Sample:

etc., etc.

Not counting architectural, engineering and design costs that you'd have anyway, we're at C$79,352.07 for committee of adjustment, building permit fees, services, grading and tree protection.

We even had to provide a licensed "engineer's hydraulic report" confirming the water service required.

Laugh of the day: our Premier just announced C$45m funding to municipalities to help them cut red tape and paperwork to speed housing development!

*****

bpath

Sympathies! I am/was an infill builder, but try to be a good neighbour. No noisy work out of hours, clean streets, no garbage on site. (Mom always said I'd make someone a good wife!)

Make sure your porta-potty is tied down - we have strong winds and our neighbors potty blew over a couple times - yuck!!!

You can ask if she'd like to sell. Then resell to someone new you choose.

Re: zoning and variances: To hell with what has worked for a neighborhood for all the years it's existed. I have enough money, time, and entitlement to try to throw out those rules to suit myself and built what I want.

@ Olychick, life is changing, world is changing everyday. You cannot stop the change and who says things worked for neighborhood for years? Maybe that what existed in last years was changed to what was before. Highways being built or remodeled to make them wider so maybe YOU could get to work easier but somebody's property was taken/ bought to do that? What is allowed or not is decided at the city meetings and some are denied variances if it truelly effecting neighbors or neighborhood.

J sk, I'm not referring to changes meant to benefit a neighborhood or community. I'm talking about people with enough money to hire lawyers, apply for variances, so they can build houses WAY out of character of existing neighborhoods. Behemoths covering every square inch of lots with no set backs, etc. blocking the light of neighbors. I think you know what I mean.

I live in an area which is being redeveloped. It used to be clapboard cottages on big lots;then it was 70s brick units;  now the last cottages are giving way to two or three houses, most of them two story, on the same lot. It's not people with money getting variances, though;  the local council has made a conscious decision to encourage medium density housing to reflect changing times and needs.  The longer term residents are resigned to the changes and the more recent residents, ourselves included, are trying to fit in  as best we can.  I think, overall, most do feel the new housing is an improvement event on the 70s stuff, so that's something. Of course the character of the neighbourhood is evolving, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

You own the property along with the rights to build anything that conforms with zoning as all you neighbors have the same. This creates some of the value of your property. How much are you willing to give up to make them happy?

OP : speaking as someone who has been on both sides of your dilemma in the same neighbourhood, first by going through the demolition and building of a house, and then by being surrounded by demo/ building projects, here is my advice, for whatever it's worth.  First, don't stretch or bend the local rules.  You don't want to be known as the one who " got away" with something.  Don't build a house totally out of keeping with those around you:  one of our neighbors built a house that is literally twice the size if any other house on our street, but he kept it to a single story, so it doesn't overwhelm the houses around it.  Don't go overboard about sharing details of your plans or delivering cookies:  the former will open you up to discussions you may not want, and the latter is unnecessary. You're building a house, not asking for a favour.

Do ride herd on your construction crew (or make sure your builder does):  make sure they follow the rules on hours for when they can and cannot work, make sure they keep the site tidy when they leave for the day, ask them to keep the music down, and warn the neighbours if any asbestos removal is planned. Tro to keep noise, dust and inconvenience to a minimum (you can't eliminate these things entirely, of course). And be very, very clear about site boundaries:  one builder/homeowner on our street informed neighbours he was going to tear down an existing fence and they would have to move a meter box serving three units because it was on his property:  he apparently got quite aggressive about it. The neighbours hired a surveyor who confirmed that the meter box and fence were both on their property, not his and he backed off, but the neighbours are still angry about that (and a few other stunts, including damage to their homes caused by his demolition crew).

Regarding privacy, my cousin lost her house to Hurricane Sandy and had it built back on stilts as recommended while her neighbor kept her bungalow a single story. When the neighbor decided to lift her house a few years later, my cousin got the shock of her life to see a construction crew outside her second story bathroom, one in which she was accustomed to having privacy and not worrying about window coverings. I don’t know who was more mortified, she or the carpenters. :-)