Trim shouldn't be white-white.

Two options are find a neutral similar to the grout or find your favorite color in the brick and pull that for the trim.

Paint the porch ceiling Haint Blue.

Remove the shutters and see if that changes the vibe to the positive

Would def paint the foundation vents. Hire a decorative artists to make them look like/match the surrounding bricks. Won't cost that much and they'll disappear.

The steps, the porch and the copper roof are stunning. Major curb appeal, def worth trying to figure out a solution.

Looks like a charming, sturdy home. Definitely remove the shutters and consider the use of special masonry limewash for the bricks. Romabio is the brand usually recommended on this site.

An unrelated issue - is there a possibility of a no-step entry into the home? I’m of a mature age and that issue is first on my list. You might not be now, but you WILL BE someday.

"Hates" = prob should take a pass and wait for something more to your liking. The architecture (natural brick, grand entryway, tall stately windows) is such that it can never read as anything remotely cottagey. There is a heavy visual "weight" to the brick that white paint doesnt eliminate, and the attempt to impose an incongruous style will look off even if you were to paint it white. Never quite sure what people mean by "updating" a vintage or historic house - maybe reframe the question as how can it be freshened, and maybe brightened? Look at other refurbished historic houses - this midwesterner did some traveling around Adirondacks/ east coast last spring and loved the old victorian towns - brick and all! White + red brick can look kind of stodgy , Maybe consider some gray greens for trim or as Laurie suggests - its contrast with stark white that makes brick look dull and dark in comparison. You can also do a lot to lessen the uptight formality of a place with landscaping / add lush greenery and gardens.

I looked up the house. (Hope you do not feel offended. Since you do not own it, the house and everything about is quite public, online everywhere.) Check out the community guidelines for what may and may not be done to change the exterior of the house. They are quite strict.

https://dicommunity.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/DICA-Design-Guidelines.pdf

It is odd that most of the homes on one side of the street are white and on the other side are your color scheme. I'd question how that came about and what you are or are not allowed to do on your side of the street.

It just sounds like your SO would prefer one of the homes on the other side of the street.

Yes, he would prefer one but it's rare for homes in this community to get listed. I was able to find out that all of the red brick homes were done by one builder. The other side was a few different builders and they were originally various colors. The trend on this island is to take everything white.