A perfect summer day is when the sun is shining,
the breeze is blowing, the birds are singing,
and the lawn mower is broken.

=D

What do you call a mushroom who buys everyone drinks and is the life of the party?
A fun-gi.

hehe

My lawn's in pretty bad shape so I called Lawn Doctor. Guess what? Lawn Doctor doesn't make yard calls.
He did send out Yard Nurse.
You could tell she knew her business. She smelled like fertilizer.
Her hair looked like peat moss.
She was chewing on a rock.
I decided to stand on the front porch.
She took the grass's temperature.
She did a root scan.
Biopsied some weeds.
Sure enough, my worst fears were confirmed. My crabgrass is malignant.
She gave me the phone number for Lawn Mortician.

And God said, "Man has become too smug and sedentary." And He created fire ants.

HAHAHAHA, Susn , thank you for the many laughs,
Those were great

All I can say, Susan, is that the sun better shine soon so we can get back outside --- WAY too much time on our hands!!!!! LOL!!!!

Put on a dang snorkle and go outside! All of ya'll!
Tally Ho!
PS, where do I apply for lawn nurse?

Top Ten Signs
You Hired the Wrong Kid to Mow Your Lawn

10.He shows up with a pair of nail clippers and a Ziploc bag.

9. On the side of his mower you notice the stenciled silhouettes of thirteen cats

8. Stops frequently to nap inside the grass-catcher.

7. Always trying to impress you by stopping the mower blades with his head.

6. You notice him shoving the last of his clothes into the mulcher.

5. He's fascinated by the details of you home security system.

4. Stops every couple of minutes to smoke some clippings.

3. Somehow manages to mow the hood ornament off your Lexus.

2. Turns a goat loose and says he'll be back in three weeks.

1. No toes.

I found this funny one - no offense meant, so hope none is taken.

You Might be a Redneck Gardener If:

You mow your lawn and find a wheelbarrow.
A half moon reminds you of your fat husband pulling weeds.
You think a chain saw is a musical instrument.
You move your refrigerator and the grass underneath it is yellow.
Kudzu covers your arbor.
You don't water your front yard rather than mow it.
You know how many bags of fertilizer your car can hold.
You've ever cleaned your house with a leaf blower.
You empty the trash when you have enough to fill up the pickup.
You can amuse yourself for more that an hour with a hose.
You've been cited for reckless driving on a riding lawn mower.
You move your weed-eater to take a bath.

LOL good entertainment y'all thanks

Another couple whom my hubby and I are friends with - don't exactly take alot of care of the area where their grass should grow...
My hubby teases them that their home is build over the porthole to hell - and that is why their yard is nothing but crabgrass and fire ants!

LOL! Scuba, look into the porthole. If you see my ex-MIL your DH is right! PJ

PJ --- lol - why don't you tell us how you really feel about your ex-MIL?

LOL PJ!!! hahahhaa