Take Lori's advice....she's an expert and will not steer you in the wrong direction. I can vouch for that!!

This is classic gray (2nd from left swatch)

FWIW (and maybe not much since we’re talking about very different spaces), we just painted our attic rooms in Classic Gray and it’s a very nice neutral.

Thank you for the pictures Suebe20! Definitely helpful to see. I somehow missed your post before. Classic gray was the very first color I picked out months ago and I should have just gone with my gut.

@ElleN - Can you just go with Classic Gray then? It's really pretty! And up against your black/gray rug/table/chairs and couch would be pretty! It's not that much space to paint... (Edgecomb Gray would be nice too...)

I think I probably will go with classic gray. I've been torn between classic gray and swiss coffee, but watching the way our classic gray swatches go almost white during the sunniest part of the day I think it's as light as I want to go. Because I can still get the bright sunny feel when sun is available, but it's dark enough to be cozy in the evenings.

ElleN, I think you'll love it! After seeing the swatch, it is a very pretty neutral, and putting it next to your picture with your rug/table/chairs and your dark gray couch will be beautiful. Each wall will show differently during various times of day, etc. It seems to be a perfect neutral for your space.....

Thank you! It helps to have someone's confidence because my husband is only going to paint this thing once this decade lol.

I had the ugliest brick fireplace in my LR. Floor to ceiling in a narrow room... it took over. My husband, naturally, wanted to leave it. I tried to decorate around it, but the result was always awful. Finally, I painted it— it’s no longer an eye sore.

I strongly suggest you paint your tile and then choose the wall color. It will open up so many options for you.

https://www.bobvila.com/articles/painting-tile-floors/

It’s so tricky! I looked at Balboa Mist, Pale Oak, Intense White, Light Pewter, and Classic Gray for my bathroom... I bought pints and painted big white oak tags of each color and put it in the bathroom near the tile and in the correct lighting at various times of day. Decided on Classic Gray after much debate. I wanted Grey but a warm grey... the tile was grey but with beige undertones so I couldn’t go with anything too blue. After they painted last week, I walked in and thought they used the wrong color! It reads totally beige in the room and I was so disappointed. It does look really nice and matches well but I just didn’t want another beige bathroom.. I really wanted grey! I considered repainting but decided to leave it for now and see how I feel after a few months.

My test sample of Classic Gray looked perfect .. go figure

@cdisimone Curious. What does your test board look like up on the wall now? Does it match?

@hollybar it seems to match but iPhone pics now with artificial light are making me look like a liar, LOL. It’s photographing cooler/greyer than it appears to the eye in person. Took a few here.. either way the sample looks close enough. Sample was flat and walls are eggshell.

hmm. It looks pretty gray to me at first glance but pretty beige in comparison to the greyish tiles. I think it looks great but that's definitely frustrating.

Do you have 3000-4000k lights? Maybe it's the yellow lights.

It’s tough to get an accurate photo especially with artificial lighting but it definitely looks beige when you walk in, even with no lights in natural daylight. I actually have no idea what color temp the lights are. They were just installed so maybe a box is lying around. They are LED high hats. I haven’t installed the vanity lights yet so I can put any color temp bulb in those.

Good luck picking your color! I definitely feel your pain as I went through the same thing and still feel like I chose the wrong color for my room. Grey paint is so tricky!!!

Ellen, everything seems to read warmer in my house too so classic gray probably will look like a light beige in your house like mine. I thought it might be too light too but it definitely has more pigment on the wall than I expected, especially when trimmed out in white. Have you looked at Collingwood? It was in my mix and I liked it a lot but it was too dark for what I wanted. I attached a photo - understand that they have a slightly different color cast in the photo but since you know what classic gray looks like (the one on wall) you can see how Collingwood compares.

Also I wanted to add that your sheen may contribute to how dark the paint looks. Go with matte or flat instead of satin or eggshell and there will be less reflection of light, making color look darker and more uniform. Just make sure you get the better quality paint if you go with flat or matte that they say is “washable”. If you have kids or a lot of traffic through the area, it may still be better to go with a higher sheen than matte.

Thanks! We did look at Collingwood but like you it was too dark for us. Classic gray definitely looks more beige than grey in our house, especially when it's near the grey couch, but we are ok with that because I didn't want something too cool. We are already combating a basement feel.
The fact that classic gray looks beige against our couch makes me feel like part of your issue is that it's next to very grey tiles. Maybe you need something a bit cooler toned than the tile?
We will be doing matte in an expensive Benjamin Moore paint. My husband refuses to paint with anything but the best and he's still cheaper than a pro so I go with it lol.
Thanks for the advice!

BTW I know we've been focusing on how the paint color isn't what you want, but I also totally love your room. Might have to steal some of it as inspiration when we redo ours!

If you want a light warm color, I don’t think you can go wrong with Classic Gray... just because it wasn’t what I was expecting doesn’t mean it doesn’t look great, and everyone I know that ever used it raves about it and its versatility. Post pics with your final decision!

Ellen, I just went back and looked at your “before” pics and I also second the vote for the person who suggested Edgecomb Gray as another option that checks your boxes. As long as you’re ok with beige and not grey.. Edgecomb may work well with your existing floors AND transition nicely to newer floors in the future if you go with something more neutral or wood. It is darker than Classic Gray but by no means dark.. I used it in the rest of the second floor besides the bathroom and I really like it. It works with both greys and beiges so when I decorate I will have a lot of flexibility. It may give you that extra pigment you’re looking for while staying nice and bright, but warm.

Thanks for the picture! I really do like edgecomb gray but I'm paranoid it's going to be too dark. Wish I had done edgecomb upstairs though.
We are pretty settled on this as the flooring once we save up the dough.

I have some random thoughts...

Is the current white on the window trim and the door the chantilly lace? It seems much too bright white for the look you seem to like, and especially with the white-ish floor tile--it makes the floor tile look even more pink

You have a lot going on with the different floor tiles and the multiple areas. It's a generally busy space. Also, whatever trim is present doesn't seem like it's very special, as in it's not a big feature that you necessarily want to emphasize.

This is what I would consider. The whole space would benefit from a little pulling-together, and after looking at your inspiration pics, I would consider painting everything one warm white shade.

We did this in our basement family room, which actually has a fair amount of windows but is still not bright, and it looks great. We did benjamin moore white dove, and it just seems like a very warm finished space. Do flat/matte on the walls and semi-gloss on any trim. It seems like much more than a plain white room.

My best suggestion is to get your primer tinted to the color you're considering (please please at least consider the white dove!) and prime everything out. Why not, you have to prime anyway so nothing to lose. Do at least one of the trim areas as well to get a feel for the look. I totally get what you're saying about moving the furniture, etc, but it's probably worth a little extra effort and time up front making the color decision.

You have a ton of good suggestions so far, so not trying to make you crazy with throwing something totally new out there. But please consider white dove priming everything.

Good luck!

Sorry, forgot to add, we also did the ceiling in flat white dove. (which I normally would never do) Makes a big difference as you come down the stairs into the room. I think that would be a good idea in your space. It's just creates a soft envelope of warm color without a lot of breaking points.

Thanks. I have no idea what color the trim is right now but it's high gloss and I hate it. You can see brush strokes all over the place, especially on the doors. It's going to be virtually impossible to fix without lots of sanding, and we hate the trim shape anyway, so our plan is to replace all the trim/baseboards when we do the floors. I'm torn on painting them until then since it's such a pita.

I've seen pictures of homes done in white dove and I like it, but with the primer on the walls our space feels way to stark so I think I might need more color. That's why I ruled out Swiss coffee too.

This is our closet which we painted in Chantilly lace. It's true that it might be too high contrast with a soft warm color.

Still as lost as ever. Today tried edgecomb gray (too dark), ballet white (dark yellow), and white dove (a little too light). We're going broke on paint samples here.
The closest color is classic gray, but it's a bit too pink in one room and a bit too gray in the other. So we're thinking of trying China white and dove wing. Any opinions on those?

We did all of our main spaces in Seapearl.. Dove wing was the other big contender. I had big boards with both colors that I moved all over the house for weeks, and finally went with the Seapearl. Somehow in our light it seems more fresh, kind of "cleaner". (but the dove wing was nice too...I seem to remember once in awhile I felt the sample looked a little yellowish, but I could be wrong) The trim is white dove.

I was fighting a tendency for a lot of colors to end up with an unpleasant green undertone in our house. The Sea Pearl has been really great at all times of day, in every light.

You have the situation with the reddish floor and the yellow/orange cabinets, which is so tough. You just have to keep trying, sometimes the winner will surprise you. And I can totally relate to the fortune spent on samples...you should see my garage! But I've always felt that the time and effort is so worth it, when I end up with a result I love.

The sea pearl and dove wing are very, very similar

Thank you for recommending sea pearl! It made it to our short list but then I rejected it because I thought it was a little bit green/yellow and we are also fighting the tendency to have it come out. So maybe I'll give it another try.
We put up China white tonight, still have to see how it looks in daylight. It's a nice cozy shade but I'm afraid it might look a little dirty.

It’s going to be very hard to find a color that works perfectly in every room depending on the lighting and other colors in each room... this may be a dumb question but why don’t you find the color that works best in one room and then possibly a different color that works better in another room? Is there a reason you’re looking to paint the entire place one color?

I've heard people say that about China white at times.

Sounds like you're making progress! Seems like you're getting a better idea of the general darkness that works, now you're just searching for the right tone.

I'm sure it'll be great in the end...you'll have to post pics!

cdisimone, the space is open concept and the kitchen is in the corner where it would make rbe most sense to transition, so theres really nowhere to draw the line between two paint colors. The previous owners clearly had the same problem because they tacked a piece of trim down the middle of a wall and did two different paint colors, lol. I feel like it makes the choppiness of the tile look even worse.
But you're right, I think we will probably have to prioritize one room that is most important to us.

I see that in your first pic now. I agree one color for that area is probably best. But you could transition on a corner if you had one (see pic), or at the very least in that room that was green (I think that was a separate room). I would also make sure whatever you pick for kitchen goes ok with those oak cabinets assuming you’re not painting those too. I know it’s the worst feeling to agonize over a paint color but at the end of the day, try to remember, it’s just a coat of paint! It’s not permanent.. you can always redo it someday if you want, so try not to stress too much.

Houston, we FINALLY have a winner! Just in time to prevent my husband and/or I from going postal. We tried seapearl but it was still too dark and yellow. Honestly I'm impressed at our houses magical ability to turn every off-white into a dark yellow/tan. My mom has china white in a windowless bathroom and it looks gorgeous and spalike. In our house? Dirty beige.
Then I came across this home on Instagram and loved the color. It looks very grey in her house but I figured what the heck, greiges look full tan so maybe it'll work. And I think it does! BM Cloud Cover!
https://www.jillianharris.com/home-tour-series-master-bedroom/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=home-tour-series-master-bedroom

It's the color on the top right of the window by the couch, and above the red tile. Swiss coffee is to the left of that window. Seapearl is on the top right of the other window, with China white to the left of that window.
I also threw in a panorama so you can all laugh at the sheer chaos of 800 "neutral" paint swatches we had going.

Good for you for finding your perfect colour! Please post pics when you're done painting. Onward!

following... I have learned a lot reading the comments. :)

Congratulations!

Arghhh. The light is more moody today and now I'm less sure. Seriously, how is it physically possible for the same paint to look SO different in one house?

Ellen, I understand your struggle, but I think you’re chasing a unicorn. :) No matter what you pick it’s always going to change a little depending on lighting, other things in the room/on the wall, reflections, weather, time of day and so on. All of these colors are truly SO similar, and so faint/subtle, any of them will turn out great (and probably look different than your sample swatches anyway once the entire room is done!) Stop torturing yourself and pick one... or do eenie meenie minie mo :)

haha thank you... you are so right.
I guess I just wish when they do change, they'd change to a different shade of a color I like, not a different color altogether!
I think I decided I care most about the color of the living room, the rest has so little actual paint area and we spend less time in. So I think I'm going to go with the cloud cover.

I feel for you! You've officially entered into the "making yourself crazy" territory, a place I have been many times.

As cdisimone said, all of your colors are quite light, and very similar. At this point you'd probably be happy with any of them.

If I were at the point you are now, I would commit to getting one gallon of the top choice color. Then pick one wall that's relatively easy to do, maybe in the living room since that's the space you care the most about, and do the wall completely, edge to edge, no previous color butting against it. You should also do the trim near it in the trim color you've chosen.

This would give you a chance to make a decision based on the final look. It's a big enough area then that if it doesn't seem right, you may have an easier time figuring out why (i.e. too gray, too light, etc) and choose a better option. The good part is that your colors are so similar that it wouldn't really be a total waste and could serve as your first coat, even under a different top coat. Maybe could even use it for inside closets, that type of thing. After all, you're spending a lot of money on the samples, so either way it's not a cheap process.

I truly think that it's going to look great when you're done.

Just wanted to show you guys the final product, BM Cloud Cover! Thanks so much for all your help. I was really nervous to go this light, but you wouldn't believe the difference. I can now cook in my kitchen during the day without the lights on!
All that's left to do is everything, of course. We are hanging a chandelier over the table (need to get an electrician to wire it), and need curtains and art. And I'd love to change out the doorknobs and the old yellow smoke detectors. Eventually....

And some nighttime shots (sitting room is 2700K, all others are 3000K, so pretty cool lights).

I love it! Super pretty. The work and stress paid off.....congrats!!

ElleN, it looks so great! Creamy, soothing, compliments everything! Hooray!

Wonderful transformation! Enjoy!

Great choice! Looks absolutely wonderful- light, bright, inviting. Nice job!

Thanks everyone! I was so nervous going this light but I'm so good I took the risk. Please let me know if you have suggestions for curtains of art.

Looks great! And your story is making me more convinced that going light is not always a bad thing.

And we have a house that turns almost every supposed neutral gray into baby blue.

For what it's worth, BM Halo looked straight-up green in our space.