1st of all I hope the parents were able to delete the pic's (if any) before being forwarded or hitting the internet .
2nd I hope your daughter has learned that sexting is not allowed until he "puts a ring on it".
3rd It's hard to find a teenage boy who picks parents wishes over his own hormones. ( I'm not saying that they don't exist)
4th He might be over it.
Possibly in time building a casual friendship at school will grow .

I would stay out of as far as contacting the other parents. I think interfering with their decisions as parents would be a mistake as would being critical of their decisions in front of your daughter. They are doing what they feel is best. Just be there if your daughter wants to talk and support her-this is a pretty good way to learn a lesson and it is a natural consequence to poorly-thought-out behavior (which it seems so many kids engage in these days). She could have experienced much worse consequences than this. I am guessing that you have discussed all this with her. When the time is right, you could talk about it in more depth. Very few of us did not have a broken heart at some point in high school. She will move on without you telling her to do so. If she doesn't for some reason or if you sense or hear from others that she is not bouncing back in a few weeks, then you may need to address it more directly with her since you don't want her to become depressed to the point that she is losing herself and her friends.

An extra hug or popping in at bedtime to say, "How are you doing?" never hurts. She will probably say she is fine and not open up, but at least she knows you are there when she wants to talk. She is lucky this was caught quickly and stopped. Might not hurt to take away some phone apps like texting and sending photos.

This post was edited by cyn427 on Tue, Aug 6, 13 at 17:15

Daughter needs to move on. You have nothing to discuss with the other parents unless you want to try to change their minds - which would be a mistake. The boy's parents acted appropriately and your daughter needs to understand the depth of her mistake and live with the consequences.

Luckily, they are just kids and a little heartbreak does a young spirit good.

Waiting till she is a senior is a waste of her high school years. She should have plenty of friends and possibly group dates. I agree with the above. It sounds like he is planning to move on and so should she.

Hugs to you too as it's hard to see our daughters with broken hearts. Been there many times.

So sorry that you're going through all of this. I can remember wanting to spend time with a boy that my parents didn't approve of as a teenager. The battles were endless and the whole thing was exhausting. Looking back, I wish they would have fought harder to keep him from me. I was not ready for the relationship that I was involved in and my parents knew it. As a parent, I would do the same thing. It sounds like they have made some mistakes and cooling the whole thing down is a good thing. The kids need to focus on doing well in school and their other responsibilities.
I think that High school will be looked back upon fondly if teens don't make big mistakes that they will regret. Be there for your daughter and validate her feelings. But help her to get through each day and move on. If he eventually is the one for her, he will be. The whole "let him go and if he comes back he's yours" applies here. Hugs to you.

Actions have consequences, and sometimes they are painful, but great lessons. We removed texting and picture message privileges from our DS's phone after we found inappropriate messages and images from girls on it. Technology is great, but this is an example of the extreme downside in the hands of young people too immature to make good decisions. I understand the boy's parents' decision as well as your daughter's disappointment. But I have learned the hard way that shielding a child from the consequences of his own actions is detrimental to his developing responsibility, integrity, and maturity. Do not enable by trying to solve your daughter's problems for her. This experience is the result of the path she chose. As a parent, it is important to allow her to hurt so that she can grow from this. She needs to know that while you empathize with her sadness, are there for her, and love her unconditionally, you aren't going to jump in and try to rescue her from the consequences here by contacting the boys' parents. Growing up isn't for the faint of heart, and neither is parenting a teenager.

What Jan said.

Another vote for what Jan said.

You need nerves of steel to be a parent now. Your daughter made a poor choice and if she's lucky, that's where it will end. She doesn't need to see you trying to fix it for her by contacting the boy's parents - you need to stay out of it, IMO. Nor does she need to hear you say that maybe in time he'll 'come back to her' - he's moved on and so should she. What you can do for her is help to keep her busy with family activities when her school activities permit the time. Homework, clubs, sports, part time job - whatever she's involved with should be priority and if she doesn't participate then set that as a goal. After that, be a really busy family - family dinners, movie night, volunteer together at an animal shelter, get together with cousins or other families for game nights..... corny as it may sound, keep her busy and keep her close. She shouldn't be a hermit and of course needs her friends so include them when possible. Good luck - parenting is hard work.

Very sound advice, Jan!

Thank you all for your advice. Believe it or not they were all in my heart when the whole situation came to light. I just needed them in my head.

Nerves of steel, indeed. This is the stage of development that will show you why mama eagles push their babies out of the nest. When they are young, they step on your feet. When they get older, they step on your heart. The only solution is to parent teens with your head.

It will be OK. She will move on. This will pass. Stand strong.

Lolita, I'm glad you came back. I was hoping you weren't put off by the advice here, especially mine.

Lolita, I'm glad you came back. I was hoping you weren't put off by the advice here, especially mine.