I don't know much about this area of the country. Is Anapolis too pricey? Charlottesville?

Charlottesville is lovely. We also had looked at Roanoke which was very interesting and had a lot more than you might imagine......but it seemed somewhat remote. I do think it's worth a look.

I can't recall where trailrunner is but it was Va.

Are you interested in being in DC orbit? Reston, Herndon?

Exciting. We looked in so many areas, Va, NC, Tennessee, and then DD met and married someone very attached to the greater Philadelphia area and here we are.

FWIW, my sister always says Lewes, DE is cute?

We spend a week in Lewes every summer with the extended family. Nice place, bad healthcare system. Also getting overcrowded with ugly subdivisions. It's a shame.

I have a house in Rehoboth Beach (next town on the ocean south of Lewes). SaS speaks the truth. Used to be so charming but their growth is exponential and infrastracture is strained in every possible way.

I love Annapolis too.

I live in Charlottesville and love it, but it is becoming like a lot of the rest of the world. it does have excellent medical,tons of restaurants and grocery stores, entertainment, many wineries-breweries-distilleries, and traffic is manageable. Scenery is gorgeous and spring and fall are magnificent.

Lexington was recently listed as a town where many residents walk to work. … But if I lived in the charming town of Lexington I’d be driving to Cville for a lot of errands.

I have a friend who has lived in many places and are looking for a permanent place to retire to. Right now, she's debating between Greenville and Chattanooga area.

Have you considered Richmond? I’ve only been once and know nothing of the school systems, but it impressed me as a good sized city with some charming areas, with distinctive towns and suburbs as part of the metro area. It’s nothing like St. Louis but I got a similar feel from it.

I would look for a college town. I live in a college town. There is always something to do from sports to lectures to traveling road shows. We have a vibrant food scene. And good medical care with a large city nearby (1.5 hours) for more extensive care, if needed. Also, college towns, IMO, tend to have better school systems.

Look at Blacksburg, VA or maybe Roanoke.

Not a college town, but I’ve heard the Ellijay GA is a great place to retire.

When we retired with kids in elementary school, I bought a book about the best college towns. I do think that is the place to focus. We ended up randomly falling in love with our home in CT when we were looking for a new lakehouse. Before that, our short list was all college towns in the mid-Atlantic area; i may still have the list somewhere. The other thing I liked about college towns is they tend to be liberal, almost no matter where they are.

I've never been there, but adult children of a friend of mine lived in Shepherdstown, WV (they have since moved to Lancaster, PA for work). It seems like a cool, artsy town with Potomac River access for kayaking and a lot of history. It is not a backwoods kind of place from what they told me. Also a college town!

WV must be a great state--I, too, have friends who are interested in moving there, and particularly for an active lifestyle. They're former military, and have lived all over.

I tend to favor college towns. Vibrant and active. Young people also equate, to me, hopefulness and opportunity. Many college towns have adequate or better healthcare facilities. And of those I'm familiar with, .the local school systems are excellent because university personnel demand it.

I wouldn't think of Virginia as a semi-warm state although it is a beautiful state. I think the winters could still be pretty cold. Have you considered SC or GA? My sister lives in Mt. Pleasant, SC which is a suburb of Charleston. Their winters are like fall. Of course the summers can be very hot, but they are in an area where they get the ocean breeze, so it just depends. We were just in Ellijay, GA last month (stayed in Blue Ridge which is adjacent). To me it is a bit isolated. I don't know anything about the schools or medical. I do believe we saw one hospital, but never found a good grocery store! Lots of outside activities. We live in Tennessee in a little unincorporated city between 3 larger cities. One is a college town with a teaching hospital among several other hospitals. One is a touristy area and the third is a nice city with good education and a hospital that has a program in conjunction with Mayo. I could never live in a big city. We like our space and peace and quiet haha! But we love having that and being so near cities that have much to offer. I don't think we will ever leave here. We moved about 30 minutes from our home town and built our home here.

One of my best friends' sister lives in Greeneville, SC. It is a nice town. Again, they can have cold winters. We can too, but we usually have short winters. We did have one snow this winter but we are now springing out. Trees and flowers blooming and we have been 70ish until yesterday and today - it's been rainy and upper 50's - low 60's. We have beautiful lakes and mountains in our area, so lots of outdoor things to do. Good luck and have fun checking out places!

Chattanooga has excellent private schools including a couple with boarding. It’s good to have options even if the intention is to use public schools.

Yes, housing is expensive in Charleston. There are other suburbs and I have never checked prices, so it may be worth looking at. There are birdbrains and not-so-birdbrains (LOL) everywhere. Some can ignore it, some can't. I do understand what you are saying though. I forgot to mention Chattanooga, it is a little under 2 hours away from us. Nice area, nice waterfront area. Short drive to larger cities. Good medical and schools, at least medical used to be. We had relatives there who have since moved, so I don't know as much about it now.

I have all your requirements plus a decent airport within a 45-minute drive. (And not a drive to the airport like we have in Denver, where the airport is 50 minutes if you drive like a race car driver on crazy roads).

We have been looking at small towns around the NC Triangle but most things that are available are either really large houses, which we don't want or need, or tract houses with no charm. Or really expensive!

Politics does play a part in our decision. I won't live in a state that refuses to acknowledge a woman's right to autonomy in child bearing decisions.

Ally De, tell me more about Anapolis. My dd just mentioned MD. She likes some of the towns around Anapolis. There are some highly rated school districts there and the downtowns seem vibrant.

She also said she is willing to go a little bit colder (ie, MD) as long as there is sun. (no, not moving to CO). She is worried that I will hate a more southern state. She is probably right. I keep telling her the draw for us is being near her.

So still thinking about VA, looking at DE and wondering aboiut Anapolis. We probably wouldn't do TN or GA as it would be easier to drive to our summer house in CT (have a car there, etc.)

And this is probably three years out. (But if DH retires sooner, he and I might move to the community first.)

Annapolis is lovely-- I have a number of friends that live in Annapolis or nearby communities. I wouldnt say that Havre de Grace is "walkable" as the residential areas I am familiar with are more isolated but my friends have a boat launch in their backyard and their neighborhoods are highly walkable. Also, there is a nice mix of older homes with great character and newer builds. Plenty for all tastes and preferences.

That said, Annapolis is what? 1 hr from Phila? The weather isnt going to be that different... but it is surely close enough you could take a weekend away and get a taste of it.

I know as I am considering places I would like to consider for retirement, college towns are definitely a draw. I NEED vs WANT a highly walkable community-- one that includes easy access to all services, entertainment etc. Also love that college towns typically offer plenty of restaurants, venues, activities and events.

That said, Annapolis is what? 1 hr from Phila?

2 hrs. It's a bit warmer, weather-wise.

As for Havre de Grace, I have relatives there and have spent a lot of time in the area. While it's a nice place to visit, I definitely wouldn't want to live there.

I took the weather requirement as the warmer the better, but nothing North of Mid-Atlantic?

And yes, absolutely there are bird-brains and not bird-brains everywhere, but I have heard many people say that socializing had become an issue for them because they live in an area where fewer people share their values. That would pain me. In CT, my area was about 60/40 D/R, and in Maine it is the reverse. Their are both fine with me.

With Mt P in particular I came across some venom from that particular politician and told DH - no way I am paying my (very considerable) property tax dollars to fund a dime of her salary. Send her back to the Waffle House. Done.

PS Jojo, back to you! Sorry. I think you need to go on a few romantic weekends to do your due diligence! That's what we did. It's fun even if you don't decide. : )

Annapolis and all of Delaware are both south of Philly so they're generally a few degrees warmer. Maybe a few degrees either way. We get nice ocean breezes in Rehoboth that make things a few degrees cooler in the summer.

Delaware's big draw is generally retirees, for the tax advantages. New people are having a very hard time finding health care in the southern part of the state near the beaches - but many of them are driving to Philly, Baltimore or Wilmington for specialty care now anyway.

I'm from NY, and I still choose to get all of my health care in NY. Access to quality health care in that area is a valid concern.

If you like a "beach-y" vibe, Southern Delaware (Lewes, Rehoboth, and Bethany Beach) all have that, in slightly different ways in each town.

Annapolis feels more like a "port city" than a beach town. (Maybe no one but me feels that, I don't know...) And as I sit here trying to quantify what that means, I'm struggling. It's bigger, it feels more like a small city than a beach town. Plus it's much closer to major cities (Baltimore/DC) too, which can be a plus.

There are a number of really cute but mostly really small towns in the eastern shore area of Maryland, basically across the Chesapeake from Annapolis. It might be worth swinging through there too to see if anything strikes your fancy.

Charlotte is too conservative? Or is it something else about Charlotte she doesn’t like? FWIW, I live in a small college town close to Charlotte (she probably knows the town) that is utterly charming, has amazing cultural events, fine dining, and utterly liberal. Like extrordinarily liberal. 🤣 We are just run of the mill economic Republicans and socialize just fine with everyone, lol. Actually, there are plenty of ”closeted” Rs like us…but since no one really talks about it just isn’t a thing. 🤷‍♀️ Anyway, NC is definitely a solidly purple state (Dem gov.) No crazy reproductive restrictions. And nice and warm! Close to the mountains and the beach. And I think the people are generally kind and friendly.

Nini, I won't speak for Jojo, but she clearly stated: I won't live in a state that refuses to acknowledge a woman's right to autonomy in child bearing decisions.

That would eliminate NC from consideration.

https://states.guttmacher.org/policies/?gad_source=1&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIy7_Yx-XihAMVsnJHAR1_8wJMEAAYASAAEgLrLPD_BwE

There is something to be said for swing state real estate and being part of the change. Not everyone's cup of tea, I know but one of the many ways to make a difference. NC is purple as nini said with more sparsely populated areas generally R and the population centers generally blue as is the case in many states. For the moment we have a D Gov but he has hit term limit - our current AG just won the D primary for Gov and is running against a 100% wackadoodle. That said... there are rural-ish areas near Raleigh/Durham that hit the education/medical/college parameters.

I'm with you on that, JoJo -- I refuse to even spend travel dollars in those states. I'm also avoiding permit-less carry states.

I think for now NC has limits but doesn't have deadly anti-women laws. But these things can change with elections.

EDITED: I just read the link from Feathers -- actually many roadblocks to women in NC!

I stand by my viewpoint: I won't live in a state that refuses to acknowledge a woman's right to autonomy in child bearing decisions.

That being said, there are places in NC like Asheville that give me hope for the future. And my nephew lives in Greensboro which I'm told by his mom, is becoming rather liberal.

My daughter lives outside Charlotte, in a college town known for its quaintness, charming homes on tree-lined streets and old money. She however lives in a planned community outside of town but still in the zipcode. In her sparsely-treed development every house looks almost identical and souless. And maybe due to heat (?) people aren't out and about in her neighborhood. And why would they? There is no place to walk, except for the playgrounds in the development. She says the people her age that she has met in her neighborhood are very friendly but one of the first questions they'll ask her is where does she go to church. We're not at all religious and dd feels she doesn't have much in common with them.

And Nini, I think we're talking about the same town.

Ally De .. i would say you are right on. Annapolis is not a beach-y town at all. (Was that a requirement? if so, sorry-- I missed it!)

That said, I gave some misleading info above. I thought Havre de Grace was closer to Annapolis than it is. I have traveled to Phila --> Havre de Grace but not Phila ---> Annapolis. Now that I actually looked at the map, Annapolis is definitely further than an hour from Phila. Still .. a nice area :)

I have friends who just moved cross country to retire on the eastern shore. They have a very fun quirky modern home right on the water-- perfect for them because they are boaters (sail and motor). I didnt suggest it because it didnt seem to be what Jojoco is looking for .. but definitely a beautiful area!

Far from where you are looking, and a bit colder (though probably not as cold as you would think from its latitude), but Walla Walla, WA fits most of the criteria. My sister went to college at Whitman, and it has a lovely, walkable downtown.

I hope some day I can forget about it again.

That's why November is critically important for the future of our democracy.

Jojoco, that’s a very common question generally in the south as the prevalence of religious affilation is so much greater here than in other parts of the U.S. When we lived in New York we were asked what do you do, and when we lived in St. Louis it was where did you go to school, and in Florida it was where are you from. For many people it’s just their ice breaker because they don’t know what else to ask 🙂 We still live in the south because this is where our families are, and our kids are here because we are. We now feel a responsibility to stay and vote our values in hopes of change. That said, if I wasn’t from Georgia there is no way I’d ever move to this state.

(Re: travel dollars supporting locations with anti-women policies, we are going to a Florida Atlantic beach for a few days after the spring break months, even though we think the state's political priorities are ... goofy. We made an easy decision, easy flight and no further schlepping a priority since the pup is traveling with us and I just need the lift that being by the ocean always provides.)

I also wanted to throw in a thought about climate/temperature as a criteria for a move. I guess my thought is that avoiding excessive heat may well be as consequential as the more traditional cold avoidance.

I need to get this off my chest. I'm not fond of our state's leader and his cronies at all, but not visiting a state because of political differences will keep those tax dollars away from our innocent children's school districts, infrastructure, and everything else.

not visiting a state because of political differences will keep those tax dollars away

Yes, that is the point.

As far as invoking innocent children, innocent children are everywhere. They have parents who vote and shape local policy, or should be.

Note: I personally do not choose where to visit based on policy, just trying to explain the logic. My kids have mentioned it when we discuss foreign travel.

Oakley, as a Blue State resident (NJ) my taxes help finance Red States' needs.

“but not visiting a state because of political differences will keep those tax dollars away from our innocent children's school districts, infrastructure, and everything else.”

And some live in a state where the governor does not accept federal funding for things like the infrastructure.

@Oakley your state also turns down federal money for programs that benefit it‘s population.

“but not visiting a state because of political differences will keep those tax dollars away from our innocent children's school districts, infrastructure, and everything else.”

The governor of my state refused federal assistance for the summer food program citing need for ‘self-sufficiency’. And yet he wasted no time handing out massive raises for 11 cabinet members.

Btw, Oklahoma did the same to its innocent children.