I am going to play mix & match b/c none of those work (for me, anyway). With the gold sink, I would do the #2 cabinets, the #1 counter, and maybe the #1 backsplash. I think all the light fixtures work, and the hardware works, but I don't love the floor with the gold sink. It looks too rustic. Perhaps a designer will weigh in on mixing rustic and luxe elements. If you are set on the gold sink, I would stay away from light or medium grays. Cool grays would clash with your sink, and warm grays or greiges would look weird (to my eye) with that much gold. I'm not sure if the dark cabs here are black or charcoal, but I think they do work with the gold. As to the backsplash, you can pick that last. Focus on the counter before the splash.

you're right, the more I look at it the more I don't like it. I love a dark charcoal gray cabinet. How about something like this

I looked at your 3 options and I wondered why you chose blacks/grays AND browns. The gold would blend better with browns in my opinion. I'm with stillpitpat.

Number 3 but can you find a way to mix some white cabs w the gray . Upper? or a section of vertical tall cabinets? Or an island? Why do you want to paint all your cabinets yourself?

The cabinet maker is custom making unfinished cabinets, all the prefab ones don't fit in my kitchen without using a lot of filler because it curves. He is taking care of the painting as well. I have thought about white uppers and dark lowers. I'm very open on all ideas but I don't like the idea of brown though, it wouldn't go with the rest of my house which very light. I have white/gray floors and blue gray walls everywhere. The kitchen connects to the family room so I need it to flow. I saw in a showroom a charcoal gray cabinet with gold knobs and I feel in love with it, so that's why i'm going with this color scheme.

brown wouldnt be any darker than dark gray. dark brown/espresso maybe? your floor is warm and the gold is warm. at least play around with it? are there warmer shades of gray you could use? i also think white subway tiles are super boring, but maybe you need something like that for balance and at least here it provides contrast...its just what everyone does and i think it will come to be what dates kitchens in the future. at least you aren't pairing it with all white everything!

I think I'm just going to scratch all of my ideas for now, and start over again :)

beware of square cornered/stright walled sinks- we have one in a rental and it is horrendous for keeping clean-yuck!- looks great, but hard to get bits of food sauce that love to hide in the corners.