Such a funny thread. Poor OP must have run away...hopefully she can laugh at the conversation. Anyway, I would NEVER ask my guests to remove their shoes, except for the kids after playing in my backyard full of Georgia clay. Could not imagine requesting my older southern belle neighbor ladies to remove their pretty footwear before entering my home. Just does not seem like the classy thing to do...at least where I'm from. And we have it pretty nasty here in Georgia with rain and red clay. I will say that no adult guest has ever walked in my home with nasty shoes and people do offer to remove before entering if the weather has been yucky. For this, I have a bench beside my garage/DR door and a shoe rack. I ALWAYS open my garage on nasty days when I'm expecting company. Hate the thought of folks running through the rain to get all the way to the front door. My family usually removes shoes at the door except for DH after work. He walks straight to his closet and puts his work shoes on their rack.

As far as the concern over pesticides and things being tracked in on shoes...that's why the people who live in my home take shoes off at the door. We can't live in a totally sterile home/world and I'm just not going to have a melt down over people's shoes even on my very nice, expensive antique rug.

For a solution to the original question, just get a pretty entry table with a mirror or artwork above it. Set a lamp and a couple accessories on top. If you're not going to allow people to use the bench for it's purpose then it makes no sense at all to put one there.

I couldn't help myself yesterday. I clicked on this thread. Then I had dreams of brown recluse spiders. I don't even know what they look like, but they sure were ugly in my dream. They also could hop really far. ICK!

I guess it serves me right for opening the thread. :)

Sorry to give you nightmares! :)

Actually, if we hadn't just built a new house and disturbed its habitat, it probably wouldn't have found its way into my shoe.

Nevertheless, I am sufficiently fearful of creepie crawlies in my shoes, so - I don't care where you live - I'm not leaving my shoes outside!

For those who wonder why some of us don't like to take off our shoes in other people's houses, here's my attempt at explaining.

I go barefoot at home. But it's my home; my space.

When I'm at someone else's house, I feel that I am out in public. And that means that I should be fully dressed. Taking my shoes off is, for me, reserved for more intimate settings, like my own living room. It makes me feel slightly undressed. Not naked, but the way you would feel if you were chatting with someone and happened to glance down and two strategically placed buttons on your blouse had popped open. Embarrassed and a bit uncomfortable. It's slightly better if I have socks on, and worse if I'm completely barefoot. It just makes me feel a) out of place and b) as if my grandmother were spinning in her grave, "My own granddaughter! Out in public without her shoes!"

When asked, I remove my shoes. But it makes me feel uncomfortable. So I will base any return visits to a no-shoes house based on that fact. I only know two houses that are shoes-off. At one, I can bring some indoor shoes and wear those in the house, so I have no problem visiting. At the other, I limit my visits. I have indoor shoes because my SIL comes from a culture that does require shoe removal, and her entire family has several sets of visitor slippers and shoes waiting at the door. But they live far enough away that a visit under a week is kind of silly, so I bring my own comfortable indoor shoes, which are just a pair of Keds sneakers. They all have indoor and outdoor shoes and change each time they enter or leave.

And I've never tromped through someone's house with muddy or dirty or snowy shoes. If the weather's going to be a problem, I carry indoor shoes or slippers and change when I get inside--whether they are shoes-on or shoes-off.

No way am I going to comment on "shoes inside the home"--or give the OP any suggestions other than to get a contractor to take out that front door and sheetrock over everything and turn that entryway into just another room.

I will say only this: My stock in Orville Redenbacher has skyrocketed overnight! Thank you, all!!! hahahaha.

I have no doubt that Anji posted this pseudo-question just to drag us all out of the summer doldrums!

Boop, you need to acquaint yourself with Brown Recluse because they've spread all over the United States.

They are also known as Fiddlebacks. They're a small brown spider with a fiddle mark on their backs. They live in dark areas like clothing, closets, corners of rooms, etc.

And they are FAST runners which makes it even more scary.

When they bite you can lose a large amount of flesh.

We have Terminix spray here every 3 months and this summer is really bad with insects and spiders. They also like to come up the pipes like the kitchen sink and bathtub.

Vile creatures!

like i've said. i go barefoot all the time and my kids do too...but i wouldn't go barefoot at someone else's house, unless they're really good friends(??-now that's special!)
but i don't think it would ever have occured to me that my going barefoot in someone elses home would gross them out...(unless of course i had toenail fungus or some other unappealing ailment!)
it does however gross me out to go barefoot in hotel rooms!!!

i guess one could throw a "byos" party---bring your own slippers!!! prizes could be awarded for the cutest/strangest ones... indoor only slippers allowed, of course!

Ya know, in the winter when it's bad weather (snow)
I always bring along a pair of shoes to change out of
my boots in someones house. I would never think of walking
through someones house with wet, snowy, sloshy, salty,
boots on. That is just common sense.
However, in nice weather I just wipe my feet (with shoes on) both outside and inside.

I would expect a household with a no-shoes policy that includes visitors would be prepared for bare feet. They would have something (hopefully washable) available for people to put on because many people don't wear socks in the summer time. Anyone who doesn't want shoes is not going to want a bunch of bare feet either. I wouldn't wear someone's public slippers if I had bare feet or nylons on.

For me, there are indoor 'shoes' and outdoor shoes. Personally, I simply prefer to have soft thick socks on because they're cozy and comfortable. I don't like the feel of bare feet in shoes. Or on hard floors, really. I have tile in some areas which is cold. Dirt dust does get tracked in and around even when shoes stay at the door. My sock bottoms get dirty so my floors are not that clean. I've got pets running around and I don't ask workmen or other visitors to remove their shoes. I'm not about to walk around with a bucket after they leave. If anyone is actually working on the house, I put drop cloths down to protect the flooring so it doesn't matter where those shoes have been (like the filthy floor in the men's bathroom at McDonald's or at the gas station, major ick factor, thanks, to the poster above).

When I'm at someone else's house I just ask what they'd like me to do. I love to just be in my socks so it's no big deal. Nylons are like barefeet, so would be another story.

Socks/slippers are also good to wear for those brown recluse spiders. I know someone who always wears shoes in the house but has been bitten from walking to the bathroom at night (or else it was MRSA from the gym/spa). They were advised by the doctor to always wear something on their feet to avoid that from happening again.

It's a very personal preference, shoes or no shoes. My parents keep their outside shoes on around the house because floors are dirty and they don't like the thought of not wearing their shoes. But it's a bigger deal for them to lace up. My everyday shoes are easy slip ons. I don't like slippers. It would probably be a good idea to get those socks with the no-slip bottoms for around the house, socks are slippery. Maybe I need some of those cedar shoe shapers to keep the bugs out of my empty shoes, too ; )

LOL Magnaverde. I had to show (red-faced) my sunroom sofa with the plastic sheet. Though, in my defense, the plastic is there to keep the dogs off the sofa and to keep my youngest Aussie from dragging the throw pillows out the dog door and murdering them in the back yard....you know, the old adage, past performance predicting future behavior..

Should we bury this thread for another month?

Bury this thread? Heck no - it's too much fun! I have a couple questions:

1. Since pets were brought up, do you not allow pets in a no-shoes household? Or do you seriously wash their feet after every trip outside or to the litter box? How many of you let them sleep in/on your beds and furniture?

2. My neighbor and her kids never wear shoes, inside or out. Their feet are very dirty, yet they have a lovely, clean home. Would you allow them into your homes with their dirty feet, or would you make them wash or cover them with socks or something you provide?

3. I really do have a raging case of toenail fungus and, at the moment, athlete's foot. I am under a doctor's care, but in the meantime, I am very infectious and my feet are embarrassingly hideous. Would you really prefer to risk catching my fungi to whatever is on my shoes? How can you put on shoes without touching them? Do you wash your hands after touching your shoes? Do you keep ALL shoes in the garage at all times, or do you move them to your bedrooms every day? How do you control the shoe dirt in the bedroom if you do move them there?

When you mentioned the litter box I remembered what happened yesterday. It took me awhile to figure it out. I saw these grayish kitty footprints going from the utility room to the back door. That's a long walk.

I couldn't figure it out because we haven't had rain.

We keep the litter box, food and water in the utility room. If I'm right, Miss Lizzie, my cat, somehow put her paws in the water bowl, then got in the litterbox and it turned into that litter "mud" and then she made prints from the tile to the wood floor, and it ended at the back door.

I just laughed and cleaned up the spots, but I'd hate not to have pets because of the messes. And pets DO bring fleas into the house! Children bring home lice. lol Face it, we can't escape yucky things in our homes.

Maybe this will be helpful. I was reading another topic the OP did and she said her decorating style is "Lush traditional."

I can't vision a "lush" entryway. I can vision a beautiful entryway with nice furniture though, and room for shoes.

Honestly, I do wish she'd post a picture here because it's impossible to give advice without one, especially when she said, "I'd like to buy a bench" then turned around and said there's no room for a bench! Didn't you all catch that in her second reply?

If the OP is reading this, my husband usually leaves his tennis shoes on the hearth which is next to his chair in the living room. Not in the entryway, but the hearth. It doesn't bother me in the slightest. It doesn't make my room look messy, it makes it look lived in. And the cost of that room alone would pay for a nice house. :)

I think she meant a bench could only be put well inside the room. For the purpose of shoe removal, some people would have to walk across the foyer to sit down so that wouldn't work for her. She wants shoes off immediately inside or outside the door so dirt, chemicals, and bio stuff isn't tracked across and around the floors of their home.

I'm not particularly dirt or germaphobic but much prefer unknown stuff from outside my home to not be tracked all around the inside. Shoes also create more and dirtier cleaning. Most people have a certain comfort level of living in their own dirt versus whatever might be brought in from the outside world (or left behind by previous homeowners).

There is no such thing as clean, really. Everything is naturally covered with bacteria and germs, as far as that component goes. That's what immune systems are for.

I like Dr Gupta's sound advice to keep chemicals and toxins at the door.

If the OP is reading this, my husband usually leaves his tennis shoes on the hearth which is next to his chair in the living room. Not in the entryway, but the hearth.

OMG, are we married to the same guy?!

I was well aware of the fact that this post most likely was a toss of the wok ;-) but it's always an interesting diversion and, frankly, good timing.

I think many of us need to be reminded there is a real person behind the original post with real human feelings. Shame on us for not remembering that.

So friends, before hitting the send button please remember that. And maybe even before you take the time to write such hurtful things you could remember this bit of information from an animated childhood movie most of us has seen at least once...
"If you can't say somethin' nice, don't say nothin' at all". If a little animated bunny can remember it I think we all can too.

Here is a link that might be useful: Just watch the first thirty seconds.

I'm in California and I don't have any friends that want me to take off my shoes. I would not feel comfortable with that because not having shoes on is something I do in the comfort and privacy of my home. It would be like asking me to hang out at a party with my bathrobe.

While I don't agree with the OP's no shoes ever policy, I do have great admiration for her refusal to "rise to the bait". There is plenty of bait in this thread.

Most of it is in good fun, with thoughts and opinions- aimed at shoe v bare feet discussion; ideas for solving the problem for the OP; and margaritas and dirty martinis thrown in for a bit of silliness.

"Most of it is in good fun, with thoughts and opinions- aimed at shoe v bare feet discussion; ideas for solving the problem for the OP; and margaritas and dirty martinis thrown in for a bit of silliness."
But at who's expense? If you notice the OP hasn't returned since Monday. I would rather error on the safe side than hurt someones feelings. That's all I'm saying.

I don't think OP's feelings are hurt. I think she hasn't returned to comment because she's not getting the answers she wants, so what's the point. She herself realized there is no answer to her question. Pretty sure she's reading, though, because she's posting elsewhere. If her feelings were hurt, she'd tell us or she wouldn't post at all.

"she hasn't returned to comment because she's not getting the answers she wants ..."

Of course there are answers to her question. It has been answered numerous times with a variety of ideas on how else she might be able to decorate the area. And if her feelings were hurt, she could very well be both posting to other threads and not bothering to respond further to this one. She already made her comments about it all early on. She might also not be interested in either following or taking the bait on this one because, while fun for some, it would be a pointless and serious waste of time for most people.

I'm a decorator, not a mind reader, so I never like to assign motives to the things that people do--or don't do--and it's true that the OP hasn't returned since she asked her question on Monday, but then, on another post, she asked a question about her second-story foyer window, got a bunch of very civil answers & she hasn't returned to that topic since she asked that question, either--and that was back in May.

Now, maybe her feelings were hurt by all the insensitive comments on this thread, or maybe she's miffed because she didn't get the answer she wanted, or maybe it's that she set up a problem which, given the spatial limitations of her foyer & her desire not to have people walking six steps into her house in their shoes, really has no solution. Or, maybe it's even simpler than that. Maybe--considering that May question about her foyer, and her lack of any response to the numerous suggestions people provided on that one--she just doesn't have any manners. Or maybe it's none of those things. Maybe she's just busy. It's hard to say why she hasn't responded. All I know is that without any evidence one way or the other, there's really no reason to assume that her failure to reappear is due to our terrible, hurtful comments.

Shoes - wear 'em or not - your choice. But if you are a hunky craftsman - I may say that shirts must be removed while in my home.

"People, this is my house, not a museum.." even when I go to a museum I don't take off my shoes!

If you request guests remove their shoes, you need to provide some footwear for them so they/you don't pickup foot diseases (plantar warts, athlete's foot etc) seriously.

I'd rather deal with dirt I can see vs. the unseen. I don't think I'd feel too comfortable in your home. Just saying.

I'm with barbie, I have orthodics and don't walk in anything with arch support. Pass me some popcorn because I don't take my shoes off for anyone. I'd politely leave your house.

I don't think it's a bad idea to have guest put little covers on their shoes when they come in if they are coming in from bad weather, but asking someone to take off their shoes just creeps me out. I think it's rude.

Now rucnmom has the right idea!!

After my mother's funeral, we had people back to the house. Carpet was old and my parents always wore shoes in the house. Well, some people took off their shoes and some didn't. I really didn't care either way. But at the end of the night, my one cousin found out that someone wore her shoes home and left her with a similar pair that was the wrong size! We never did find out where her shoes went.

At my house, we take off our shoes but don't require it from guests- some do and some don't. My floor is always getting dirty anyhow- one dog and one cat and if we mow our lawn, grass clippings come in regardless of shoes.

I grew up in a town where culturally, everyone took off their shoes. It had to do with some of the industry there that is now long gone but the habit continued.

On the other hand I never saw my parents outside the bedroom without shoes or slippers on, and if my dad had on slippers and not shoes it must be Saturday morning.
To my parents going barefoot reminds them both of being required to go barefoot in the summer until they got into town (they both lived on farms) to preserve shoe leather, since it was the depression. They actually are both almost phobic about going barefoot, and practically any accident I had in the house growing up would somehow get attributed to my not wearing shoes.

My mother solved the issue by always taking slippers with her. My father, I am sure most people looked at the expression on his face if they asked him to do so and did not repeat the question. However, my father probably also went to other people's houses mostly for parties, which in their circle tended to involve nice clothes and dressy shoes not bare feet.

In my own house, we take off our shoes because we live in the dirty, spitty, dog shi...poopy city (both of us have stepped on dead rats in the past, go figure) but guests can pretty much do what they want.

I am always amazed at these threads about wearing shoes in the house go. It all seems so simple to me. People should simply do what they want in their own home and be considerate of what others seem to expect in theirs. Most of my close friends and family do not wear shoes in thier homes, and I never have a problem taking mine off, ugly feet as I have and I do wear shoes in my own home, howebeit not the same shoes I wear outside. I do have very light carpet and a layout that means everybody has to walk on it and almost everyone that comes into my home automatically removes thier shoes of thier own accord. Whenever I have been asked I always say, it is up to you.

I do agree that a pile of shoes in the entryway during "family" parties is pretty messy and unattractive, so I usually move the shoes to the laundry room which is off a nearby hallway. I really would like to add some sort of seat to the small space to make it easier for those who do have to untie shoes. I do not supply slippers but many vistors bring thier own and if asked I always have something. I have only encountered a few people (my own brothers) that have some issue with removing their shoes, and although I do not care if they take them off or not they seem offended about the idea that others do, seems to me there is something else at issue there.

It does annoy me when workmen come in with "dirty" shoes and walk on the carpet. Recently I had the basement finished and the crew refused to go down the stairs until one of them covered the carpeted stairs with self adhesive plastic which worked out great.

Hello all, the entertained, the irritated, the understanding, as well as the rude and unhumored:

First, the point of this thread wasn't to ask your opinion on my shoe policy. You're not going to change my mind, just like I'm not going to change yours. For anyone who's curious about my reasons: Sanjay Gupta's reasons are similar to my own, but to be simpler: I walk on the city sidewalks/dirt/manure/public bathrooms and everywhere else you people probably walk. If I come home with those shoes on and walk on the same floor where my baby's toys are, why wouldn't I just have my child lick the public bathroom floor? Same thing.

When I go to someone's house, I look down to see if they have their own shoes on. If they're on, I keep mine on. If they're off, I take mine off. I don't get all huffy and mentally take inventory of the 50 years of my life where I've NEVER been asked to take off/leave on my shoes. It's their house, their rules. It's not just about shoes. It's a simple matter of respect. Truthfully, I feel very uncomfortable wearing shoes inside someone's house, but I would never say this to them because I don't want to make them think I'm uncomfortable. Again, a matter of respecting others' wishes.

There are Japanese restaurants where you are required to take off your shoes. If you have not been to one, it doesn't mean they don't exist. Culture is not just about where you live. There may be a prevailing culture, but then there is also your own culture. If you, as an American, moved to India, would you suddenly not become American anymore?

Obviously I am not serious about having an outdoor cubbies and bench set. Luckily for me, my friends are very respectful people and have no problem with the shoes rule. Many of them have the same no shoes rule. I don't have internal turmoil about the rule, which is why my original question was a practical one, not a philosophical one.

Now, to the people who actually care about what I've decided regarding the *decor*:

1) I was obviously not serious about the outdoor shoe removal area. I've decided to place a bench just inside the door, tucked into the corner. Underneath the bench I will have a boot tray in case shoes are muddy/snowy/gross.

2) I've bought an outdoor doormat as a cue for "take off your shoes here or at least wipe."

3) I have considered that some people are squeamish about taking off their shoes. Strangely enough, I've never encountered this before, probably because I previously lived in a place where image is, let's just say it honestly, everything. For contractors, I have shoe covers. For guests, I can provide slippers, but I do think it's disgusting to expect people to wear previously worn slippers. I don't understand why people walk around with unkempt feet? Note: I said unkempt, not ugly.

4) I'm considering placing an outdoor floormat just inside the door. That way, if someone steps inside the house with shoes still on, I can drag that mat outside and hose it down if needed.

And lastly, thank you to the understanding and sympathetic folks who contributed helpful and constructive input.

This is really a regional/cultural thing. Around here (upper Midwest) people nearly always take their shoes off, probably because the weather is so snowy/dirty for most of the year. Nearly every party has lines of shoes/boots at the door (or, if a condo, right outside the door)as you enter. It may also be the Germanic influence: I grew up in a German American family in Chicago and we changed street shoes for house shoes (aka slippers or clogs) as soon as we came in. If people don't take their shoes off immediately upon entering, they typically ask if you want them to and oblige willingly if you say yes--even workmen are used to the drill!

I was obviously not serious about the outdoor shoe removal area.

Pardon me, but it was not at all obvious that you were joking about the outdoor shoe removal area. Here's what you said in your original post:

somewhat militant about not allowing shoes even in the entryway.

. . . it seems "appropriate" and cute to have an entryway bench or some kind of cubbyhole holder. But what is the point, if no one brings their shoes inside? Should I skip it altogether? What should I put in the lonely entryway instead then?

I for one answered the question you posed without comment on the customs in your house.

Exactly what I was thinking, graywings. There is NO OTHER WAY to interpret that.

As for I don't understand why people walk around with unkempt feet? Note: I said unkempt, not ugly. Well, ain't you the lucky ones! Never had a kid bring home athlete's foot from the gym (and CERTAINLY not lice - egad!); nor a Plantar Wart; never had a toenail fungal infection, many of which are incurable but very contagious; don't know anyone who NEEDS to wear shoes for comfort's sake. You get the drift.

I'm still curious about how and where shoes in a no-shoes-in-the-house household are kept. Do you wash your hands after touching your shoes? Do you keep all shoes in the garage? If they aren't allowed in the house, how do you allow that filth in your bedrooms? Let's see, if a family of four each as only three pair apiece, that's 12 pair, 24 shoes. I don't know a single person who owns only three pair apiece, though, so where do you store all the shoes? What about slippers, flip-flops, dress shoes. When you get dressed, do you carry the shoes of the day to the garage? Maybe you keep sanitizing wipes in the garage so, after you carry your filthy shoes from where ever they are in the house, you can sanitize your hands after touching the shoes. That must be it.

2) I've bought an outdoor doormat as a cue for "take off your shoes here or at least wipe." How very novel of you! Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever seen a house that didn't have one. Never mind.

If I come home with those shoes on and walk on the same floor where my baby's toys are, why wouldn't I just have my child lick the public bathroom floor? Same thing. Oh, please. We're all being a little ridiculous here, dontcha think? If one really thinks that way, one couldn't possibly let the baby out of the house, or even leave the house without the baby. Just think of the sneezes one walks through in the grocery store and bring back into the house. Don't pump your own gasoline; that pump is loaded with germs - maybe even "truckers' disease" and get in the car without sanitizing; you'll get it on the steering wheel.

Goodness, anjismith, you'd be wiser to worry about a million other things and relax a little about shoe dirt. And, sometimes, it is wiser to just let sleeping dogs lie.

The better part of valor is not posting a response. I should have let your message speak for itself.

This is just too ridiculous. I can't believe the way this poster is being treated for asking a simple and benign question about what to do with her own foyer.

"Goodness, anjismith, you'd be wiser to worry about a million other things and relax a little about shoe dirt. And, sometimes, it is wiser to just let sleeping dogs lie ..."

Right. Who needs to relax? Who needs to just let sleeping dogs lie? Take it up with the likes of Dr. Gupta on the ridiculousness of her concerns. It's none of your darn business how clean she likes to keep her home or what she does there anyway and she certainly doesn't/didn't need to explain her actions or concerns to anyone. As well, she did provide useful information to others who might be interested.

"If her feelings were hurt, she'd tell us or she wouldn't post at all."
"I should have let your message speak for itself."
"Bury this thread? Heck no - it's too much fun! I have a couple questions:"

First you complain because she didn't come back to eat up your wildly nasty bait then you go after her when she comes back to post on the subject. This is entirely too hot a topic for you that you continue to belabor the subject and insist on fighting and chastising her about it.

OP: I for one don't see anything wrong with your posting an un-offensive response to the exceptionally rude and nasty ones made here.

I wear Crocs 99.9% of the time but I have funky red ones to wear in the house like that Batali chef guy's orange ones. My husband changes into suede slippers.

I'd never ask guests or workmen to take off their shoes but I'd ask my mother not to wear stiletto heels on my restored floors once they are done !

And this looked perfectly clear to me:

"I was obviously not serious about the outdoor shoe removal area."

"Pardon me, but it was not at all obvious that you were joking about the outdoor shoe removal area"

You are disregarding her second post, the fifth one down:

"If I really had my way, I'd have an OUTDOOR shoe removal area with cubbies and a bench!!! LOL!" Looks pretty obvious to me that she was poking fun at her dream setup (which doesn't seem radical to me on a covered porch. I'm sure I've seen it done a number of times.)

"I for one answered the question you posed without comment on the customs in your house."

You can't be serious.

"At the risk of throwing the first salvo in a shoes vs no shoes war" ... and on it went to judgments and presumptions of err and ignorance on her part.

People really need to take it up with those in their own circle who DEMAND they remove their shoes or else leave if they don't want to. Talk about worrying about more important things! I've never run into the situation myself but as for ripping the op for it, wait until you're asked.

anji, I'm glad you found some support and useful information here to take away. Just plain silly!

Angjismith -

That was a very gracious post. Thanks for the further explanation and letting us know what you decided to do. I'm not sure I would have even continued with this thread after some of the responses you received, but I am glad you did.

tina

Ditto what Tina said.

I think one comment by the OP might capsulize what bothers many people when topics like this one are posted. The OP said:

"I have considered that some people are squeamish about taking off their shoes. Strangely enough, I've never encountered this before, probably because I previously lived in a place where image is, let's just say it honestly, everything."

This assumes that not wanting to take one's shoes off before entering a home (whether or not your feet are "unkempt"), or welcoming others to walk on your floors in their shoes, is somehow lacking in graciousness and puts forth a bad "image"--or that prohibiting use of shoes indoors is a sign of a higher class of homeowner and is a good "image".

It's not a good idea to link a shoe rule with the "image" you're talking about. That says a lot more about why some people have these rules, and it has nothing to do with fear of dirt.

Anjismith, glad you found a solution that works for you, your lifestyle and your home. Thanks for coming back and posting the update.

Seriously,... none of us were invited to her house.

I'm sure there things I do in mine or you guys do in yours that she wouldn't agree with.

Anjismith, very gracious. Glad you have the space worked out.

Boy, I don't get all that negative 'capsulization' as being her reasoning or motive from any of her posts. It certainly isn't what she's described as her own perspective. I wasn't even sure what she meant by the statement quoted above (which is at the bottom of this thread, after the fact). To me it looks like she's referring to most of the people she knows or from her previous locale being very image-conscious or immaculate about their appearance. You know, being very well groomed at all times and on all occasions, right down to having their feet as manicured as their hands.

(Some do that for others, some do it for themselves. Sometimes people are image-conscious, or judgment-conscious. Sometimes it's a snooty thing. Sometimes it's a business or professional thing. And sometimes it's just the result of a person having pride or taking good care of themselves!)

Funny, I've always found it to mean that someone is more tuned in to appearances (duh) and a lot less to what's inside, which is a sad state of affairs. Everyone seems to be so celebrity oriented now, and competitive (i.e. voting each other off the planet at the drop of a hat) and I wonder if... e.g. anyone actually reads any more? Or talks on a landline about real life vs clothes and bigger, better, best mini-mansions, holidays, nips and tucks, etc. I don't much like image conscious people I guess... of course it's important to be neat and clean, and wear clothes not embarrasingly out of date, but beyond that? Or is really just about impressing each other with looks? Yikes!

spring-meadow hit the nail on the head regarding my usage of the word "image." My previous home was where image was king and no one walked around with un-pedicured feet. I did not attach any value to it, I was stating a background fact. That is probably part of the reason I never encountered such vehement and vicious opposition to removing shoes: because everyone wanted to show off their new salon pedicures.

I promise I'm not trying to be snarky or rhetorical ... this really is simply information gathering. But, do you have dressy parties? Or any parties? Because when I dress up, my shoes are usually the most important part of what I wear. I often have a uniform of black pants, white shirt, and fabulous shoes and bag. I would be sad to lose half my outfit.

If I came to your house in outside boots and then put on my velvet flats (lined in cashmere!) once I got inside, do you consider that dirty, too? I don't think they've ever been in manure or dirt, and with teenage boys in my house I think unfortunately my bathroom floor is often probably not much different than many public bathrooms. But I don't take my velvet flats into really gross public bathrooms, anyway. (Of course, I wouldn't do that as I'd feel uncomfortable being the only shod person.)

Again, I am just trying to understand this. I understand the philosophy of customs and all that, no problem; just the actual reason behind the custom is what I'm trying to get.

Went to a party last fall where all shoes were off. I was wearing jeans and Frye boots, or something, and when I took off my boots, I was wearing two very different socks. Good lesson. Usually I don't really care, I'm in boots, no one will see my socks! (There was another friend there in mismatched socks, too; we laughed.)

I was a huge dirt eater as a child, apparently. Once my mother found me in a neighbor's delivery of, erm, natural fertilizer that looked like dirt but was really of animals. :-) I think I ate that, too. Probably explains why I don't mind marginally dirty shoes in my house and let my babies crawl around on my floors anyway.

Anji, I'm glad you clarified. However, nowhere in your original post and second reply did we get the impression you were just kidding about people having to take their shoes off outdoors. That's what baffled all of us because I don't think any of us have had to remove our shoes before we entered an entryway! lol.

Why not do a new topic showing us a picture of your entryway? I'd love to see it.

On a side note, even though I get pedicure's once in a blue moon, I can't fathom living a life where "image is everything." Come to my house any day and I'll be in my tee shirt, shorts and either barefoot or slippers. And I wouldn't have it any other way. For me, "comfort is everything."

Totally understand the no footwear allowed. We've been shoeless in our home for 30 years. Guests, dropins, etc.. also take their shoes off. I have a small entry way, but I've provided a small seat and new slippers. It's something we picked up in Asia and appreciate it.

We've been shoeless in our home for over 30 years. Although we have3 a small entryway, we have a small seat, shoe rack, and slippers (new). No one has had a problem with this rule - friends, family, contractors, etc.. It's most likely the reason we have a beautiful off white carpet that's 33 years old and looks just less than new.